All Roads/Confessions

ST: Right-o. Was calling Diana the first thing on the cards?

Dakkareth: Yes

Dakkareth: Left behind in the sanctum kitchen Isis eats mechanically, her thoughts far away. How did things get so complicated, so bad just when she'd thought the whole thing was finally over?

Why can't people just be thankful that the threat is past and not punish them even more for it by violating the cabal's privacy?

Neb had said he would try to make them back off. She herself will see to it that entrance is denied to outsiders. But if everyone is really against them then that won't help.

And if they do go through with that plan ... Isis shudders involuntarily.

She should probably talk with Diana, she reluctantly realizes. She never wanted anyone to know, keep that shameful, horrid secret safely locked away where it can be forgotten and no one else ever knows.

But that didn't work. And if /they/ ... better that Isis be the one to tell Diana, even if she really, really doesn't want to.

It takes three attempts but finally she manages to press the buttons for Diana's quick dial shortcut.

ST: Diana's phone rings for a long time before she finally picks up, and when she does it's with a note of concern.

"Isis?"

It sounds as though she might have been distracted before you called.

Dakkareth: "Hello Diana. It's me." Isis sounds very young for once. Uncertain, perhaps a little afraid. "I ... can we talk? If you have time?"

ST: "Of course I do, I'm not doing anything important. What's the matter?" A slight collection of murmuring voices in the background fades as it seems she's moving somewhere more quiet. "Why arn't you at school?"

Dakkareth: "Good." From her tone she doesn't seem entirely convinced it is in fact a good thing. "Can we meet somewhere? Somewhere safe? Where no one can listen in present or future? I'll tell you then."

ST: There's quiet on the other end of the line for a moment then finally Diana responds. "Okay. Can you get the tube down to Picadilly Circus? There's a pub down there called the Lion and Lamb, right by the station. We can talk in there." Her concern is masked by a professional coolness, but it's still there.

Dakkareth: A pause. "Would there be other people there?" Isis doesn't want to reject the offer, but she can't deal with talking about this in a public place.

ST: "It's an Arrow safehouse. We have provisions in place for meetings like this. I'll show you when you arrive." She pauses for a moment, perhaps realising that this may have wider implications. "Or we can meet somewhere else, if you like. I can meet you at my apartment if you can wait a little longer?"

Dakkareth: Quietly. "... I can wait a little longer."

ST: "That's fine. I can be out of here in an hour or so. Is three okay by you?"

Dakkareth: "Three is fine. I'll come."

"Thank you."

ST: "Take care, Isis. I'll see you soon."

Dakkareth: "See you, Diana."

ST: It's early afternoon. It's only a short wait before you need to head off.

Dakkareth: Isis decides to leave before she can reconsider. She can always wait if she arrives too early.

Dakkareth: Shortly before three Isis knocks on the door of Diana's apartment.

ST: Diana answers promptly. She's still dressed for work, in an impeccable shirt-and-trouser suit with her hair tied up securely.

"Isis. Come on, I've made us some tea."

Dakkareth: "Hello." A fleeting smile in greeting, then Isis nods and follows Diana.

ST: She leads you inside and sits you down on the sofa before heading into the kitchen; low heels clacking on the spotless wooden floor.

"Chamomile?" She calls out, knowing it was one you preferred.

Dakkareth: "Yes, thank you," Isis agrees. Maybe it will help her calm down a little.

ST: Diana returns momentarily and places two cups, one for each of you, on the low lounge table then takes a seat right next to you.

"What's going on, Isis?" She finally asks, unable to conceal her concern any longer.

Dakkareth: "I'm not sure where to begin." Isis looks down into her cup of tea. She seems conflicted. She trusts Diana, knows that she cares for her. But that makes it even harder to speak about it.

When the Sentinels pried into the mortifyingly personal matter she could take refuge in distance and abstraction, but she can't talk that way with her friend and mentor.

ST: After a moment she places a hand on your shoulder comfortingly, her frown giving way to a small smile. "Anywhere you like. Nothing will leave this room, I promise you. Truly."

Dakkareth: And what if Diana will hate her for it, thinks her tainted and foul? She couldn't bear it if she looked at her with revulsion and disgust in her eyes. What if she is angry that she kept it secret from her, what if Diana thinks her untrustworthy?

Isis nods at the promise.

"The attack at Brewer's Hall," she finally begins, still looking into her tea rather than at Diana. "You know most of what happened. But I think I made a very bad mistake then."

ST: She doesn't say anything, but nods a little and waits for you to continue at your own pace.

Dakkareth: "I fought against the manifestation. A psychic assault." She grimaces. "Touching it with my mind and magic. I should never have done that, but I was so scared ...."

A brief pause. "Or it could also have been the Mind Patterning attack from the Scelestus, I still don't know for certain. Either way ..." She hunches down, would probably like to disappear into her cup if she could.

ST: "What happened, Isis?" Her brow furrows slightly, and her voice is quiet.

Dakkareth: Disappear from Diana's regard, no matter how compassionate. Somehow avoid her looking at her knowing Isis' shameful secret.

"There was ... a splinter. In me." Isis shudders, holding on to the warmth of the teacup with both hands.

"I found out the next day. Foreign dreams, mind patterns without source."

The words come faster now, as if a dam has broken. "/Inside/ of me. An intruder. An invasion. In my mind, and I couldn't keep it out, couldn't fight it, couldn't even grasp it." Isis begins to cry, tears flowing even as she continues.

"Doing things where nothing should, changing things that are only for me to change. Like a /cancer/ in my soul, eating at me and making me not myself. With eyes of Death I could see it, like poison in my pattern."

ST: Diana is silent the whole time but when she sees your tears that comforting hand turns into an arm around your shoulders, holding you close. "Shh, shh. It's okay! It's okay. Please, don't cry."

"Is it still there?" She leans in close, voice still soft. "The splinter?"

There's a slight urgency to her tone though communicates the seriousness of the suggestion.

Dakkareth: "It was ... like a nightmare taking over reality." Isis lets herself be drawn close, crying quietly for a minute.

Finally she draws a shuddering breath, righting herself. "I destroyed it in the end," she says quietly, still sniffling a little but her voice a little firmer again.

"An Astral Quest. We made our way into my Oneiros, Neb and Kenan with me, and there confronted it."

"Eradicated every last bit of it." There is a little bit of vindictive pride there at what she accomplished. It didn't undo what happened, but she could at least get back at the thing that had assaulted her.

ST: "That was extremely dangrous!" She admonishes, though there is no edge to her voice. A tinge of relief, maybe. "Why didn't you come to me? I could have helped you."

Dakkareth: Shame, recriminations, self-loathing. "I don't want people to look at me like I'm tainted ... touched by foulness ... shameful, unworthy ..."

Isis looks away again. "I had to tell them," she says very quietly. "They could have been in danger. I didn't tell anyone else. I didn't ... don't want anyone to know."

"I was afraid people ... you would hate me."

"I just wanted to leave it behind, forget it ever happened."

ST: "Oh, Isis.." She sighs, then squeezes you. "Nothing would ever make that happen. I'll always be here for you."

"I'm- I'm proud of you, Isis." She finally adds. "You know, I can't think of anyone else who would just roll up their sleeves and deal with the problem like you. I've seen a lot of people touched by the abyss in my time here, and it's rare that anyone has the strength to overcome it alone."

Dakkareth: Isis takes a deep breath, then breathes out slowly, a heavy weight lifting from her. "Thank you," she says very quietly.

ST: "Don't mention it." She gives you a warm smile and another squeeze. "Don't be ashamed of your scars, Isis. Everyone gets them. You just need the strength to wear them with pride." She nods resolutely, something of her Arrow spirit showing through.

Dakkareth: A pause. "Still, I don't want anyone else to know. I just ... I don't."

ST: "It's okay. I'll keep it quiet. I made a promise, didn't I?"

Dakkareth: Maybe one day she can be as strong as Diana, but not yet. Right now she can't deal with that.

ST: "Never be afraid to come to me, Isis. I will always be willing to help. Just as I know you would do the same for me."

Dakkareth: "and even though they said they wouldn't tell anyone else, now there are Sentinels wanting to scry into the past of our sanctum."

"I know." She sighs. "I'm more worried about the Sentinels. Kenan told them something, even though he had /no right/," anger bleeds into her tone with some vehemence at that, though it is quickly replaced by worry again,

Dakkareth: She sighs again. "I don't want to let them, and neither does Nebuchadnezzar. But they said they might make Hierarch force us."

ST: "They want to scry your sanctum?" Her smile falters, "For what reason?"

"The infection has passed, hasn't it?"

Dakkareth: "Yes. I even allowed one of them a Soul Marks ritual to independantly confirm that, so they would let it pass and not make any more of it. I don't know why they want to look at our sanctum."

"I don't understand it. They should be happy we stopped the Scelestus, not make more trouble for us."

ST: She seems to think about it for a moment, and nods. "It sounds as though they are throwing their weight unnecessarily. If you haven't given them any reason to, I can't imagine why."

"Perhaps I should speak to Arclight on your behalf?"

Dakkareth: "They might be angry that we found him when they couldn't." Isis frowns. "A rather unworthy reason though, if it is that."

"If you think it would help, that would be nice," she says hopefully. "I really don't want to have to forcefully Ban them from the sanctum. Not that that would work ..."

ST: "I agree. Professional jealousy is unbecoming."

"I can't imagine that is something Arclight would do, though. For all his faults I'm sure he's an honest man."

ST: "Should I speak with him?"

Dakkareth: "If you think it might help," Isis nods. "Thank you."

Dakkareth: btw, what's Diana's opinion of the change in the political landscape?

ST: She's not wholly invested. She resents the use of Arrow resources as a political tool, and felt they should have been given freely if safety was such an issue.

She is rather torn, though, and believe that the Arrows are more honest and noble than the Mysterium has proven to be in the past, with their secretive hoarding and selective permissions.