SPARCS:Kibbitzing001

Final word for this scene: BlackSheep

So here we are in the warehouse in back of the mall, and there's ... y'know ... crates and stuff. Somebody better replace this text with something worth reading.

And then Jessica says something, and Frost gets all freaky-violent, and there's this big SHARD robot. What the heck happens with that?

Actually, I think it'd work to cut straight to Livewire being blasted through a shop window, out onto the concourse. Jessica 'flees' while Mystic Girl pulls the team back together.

And then, do we want to have the fight spill over into the main concourse? Do we want innocent lives on the line?

Definitely. It's more fuel for Milka's rant.

Here's a moment I know I want to see ....

A young man is fiddling with one of the video cameras on sale at the Mega-Buy electronics emporium. A skate board leans against the young man's leg. He is dressed in battered punk attire, and has several chains around one wrist. The store manager eyes him unhappily. We see the kid flipping through digital filters, making his hand look pixelated, then sepia toned, then mirrored.

Jessica runs, but not too fast, not fast enough to risk actually escaping. The robot tromps after her. She looks around desperately, and her eyes latch onto the camera in the boy's hands. She collapses, screaming in terror as the robot treads toward her.

The boy swings the camera around. We see Jessica through the camera's view ("Recording ... Recording ....") The view swings jerkily, and we see SHARD bearing down on her. The camera swings back to Jessica, as the robot's shadow covers her.

JESSICA: Oh no! Is there anyone who can possibly save me now?

I was thinking something very similar.

And then one of us has to, y'know, actually save her. Because, yeah, she's a manipulative bitch but she's also a bystander. The worst part is that her plan to manipulate us is clearly going to work. There was never really any doubt.

And then SHARD gets beaten down (or perhaps just escapes). But anyway, crisis averted.

I was thinking:

Livewire puts him down but not out in a way that leaves him in the wreckage of the electronics store. He moves in to finish him off; Vigil grabs his arm and stops him. Shard blows the place apart, bringing debris down and escaping into the sewers through the floor or something. Livewire thinks that Vigil was trying to protect him from the explosion, not protect Shard from him. Everyone gets out okay; Vigil's status in the team isn't compromised.

Then we definitely need the scene where Frost goes off on Jessica. Do we want that in front of the camera?

I think we do. The homecoming queen getting chewed out on camera by a superhero? It's the best of both worlds - Milka gets to publicly humiliate her and gets in trouble for it later. It should probably be Amy who calms her down. And then, while smiling sweetly for the cameras, very calmly threatens to break Jessica's jaw if she messes with the SPARCs again.

Yeah, I think we should definitely have the machine go into the main mall. Even if the people in charge of this op don't want publicity, the bot's a villain at heart. And Milka going off on it would be a worthwhile thing to have happen. Now I have to figure out the next scene... -- James Holloway 10:13, 29 November 2005 (PST)

Question: What have we established about Shard physically? How are people picturing him? I keep flicking between a spider and a hovering disc. Possibly a disc with various fold-out appendages and weapons?

I think of SHARD as looking quite humanoid, although larger, with a distinct head and a not-quite face. Definitely eyes. -- James Holloway 10:13, 29 November 2005 (PST)

Huh. Not what I was thinking at all. Could work, though. Anyway, let's see if I can do the user-marking thing.BlackSheep