Tangency Cookbook

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This is a space for the cooks of RPG.net to post their favorite original recipes. All comments on them should be placed on the project's discussion page.

If this gets too big, we can split it into multiple pages.

For the sake of consistency, the American values of non-metric units will be used. Thus, there are six teaspoons to the fluid ounce, and just under 30 fluid ounces per gram.

Passion Fruit Bearnaise Sauce, by Teucer

2 purple passion fruits
1 tsp lemon juice
3 egg yolks
3/4 c butter

Puree the passion fruits. Wrap the pulp in cheesecloth and squeeze it into a bowl. Clean out the blender and put into it the passion fruit juice, the lemon juice, and the egg yolks.

Bring the butter to a boil.

Puree the contents of the blender for 35 seconds. Starting after five seconds, slowly add the butter over the course of the remaining time. Immediately stop the blender and serve over fresh-grilled ribeye steaks.

Author's notes: It's been a year since I made this, so I can't say for certain that I wrote down the proportions correctly.

Banana Bread, by BethDragon

1/2 cup oil
1 cup sugar
1tsp vanilla
2 eggs
3 bananas 2 cups flour
1/2tsp baking soda
1tsp baking powder
cinnamon to taste

Mush the bananas, if they aren't already compeltely ripe and mushy. After some time, they will turn a little brown and softer, which will make them easier to mix into the batter.

Mix the wet ingredients together and then add the dry. Pour batter into greased loaf pans and bake for 1 hour at 350°. Test for doneness.

Chocolate Banana Bread - add 5tbs of cocoa powder (regular or dark) to dry mix, or to taste.

Strawberry Bread - omit cinnamon and use about 10 ounces of thawed or fresh strawberries.

Pumpkin Bread, by BethDragon

3 1/2 cups flour
2tsp baking soda
1 1/2tsp salt
4 eggs
2tsp cinnamon
1tsp nutmeg
3 cups sugar
1 cup oil
2/3 cup water
2 cups pumpkin

Mix dry ingredients together. Mix the wet ingredients together in a separate bowl and then add to the dry. Mix well. Bake at 350° for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Test for doneness. Makes at least 2 greased 9x5x3 loaves

Pumpkin Cake, by BethDragon

2 cups sugar
2tsp baking powder
2tsp cinnamon
3 eggs
1/2tsp salt
2 cups flour
2tsp baking soda
1 cup oil
2 cups pumpkin (or one of the small cans, close enough.)

Mix together all of the dry ingredients + sugar. Add oil, eggs, and pumpkin. Mix well. 9x13 greased pan. 35-40 minutes at 350°. (In angel food pan, about 60 minutes.) Test for doneness.

Cheesy Hashbrowns, by BethDragon

2lb thawed hash browns (the shredded kind)
1/2 cup milk
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 cup sour cream
1tsp pepper
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese (or more, if preferred)

Mix everything together except the hash browns and the cheese. Once mixed, add in the hash browns. Put in a greased 9x13 baking pan, patted down a bit. Top with the cheddar. Bake at 350° for 1 hour.

1 and a Quarter Hour Beef Stew, by Iceberg3k

2lb chuck roast, cubed (1" (25mm) cubes)
1/2 gallon beef stock
3 small onions, finely chopped
4 potatoes, cut into sixteenths
1 lb baby carrots, halved
3 stalks celery, diced
Spices to taste, but must include curry powder and 1 bay leaf
1 cup medium-blonde roux

Roll the beef cubes in a mixture of flour and curry powder and brown in a 2-gallon stock pot or stew pot. Add all vegetables and beef stock, plus bay leaf and spices to taste. Bring to boil, then turn heat down and simmer covered for 1 hour. Add roux, stir well and simmer for 15 more minutes. Serve with bread and a lovely beverage.

ABC Soup, by CyanideBreathmint

One chicken leg (thigh and drumstick) or half a small chicken carcass, bones and skin left on.
Three potatoes, cubed.
Two carrots, diced.
Three ribs of celery, diced.
Two large onions or four small onions, sliced into eighths.
Two tablespoons black peppercorns.
Four tablespoons crushed garlic.
Soy sauce to taste.
Salt to taste.
Six cups of water.

One tomato, cubed.
One sprig green onion, chopped finely.
Parsely or cilantro.

Get a hugeass cooking pot. Put the chicken and the vegetables in the pot. Stir the crushed garlic and soy sauce in whilst putting everything in the pot. Tie the peppercorns in a small muslin spice bag, and put that in, too.

Cover it with your six cups of water.

Keep the soup covered and leave the heat on high. If your huge soup pot has a pyrex cover it can be handy.

Go off and read something. Come back periodically and see if your soup is bubbling.

If it is at a decent boil, taste the broth and then salt it to taste at this point. Don't worry if it tastes like bland dishwater. It will turn better later.

Turn the heat to medium, keep the pot covered, and then go back and read something.

Check back periodically every half an hour for three hours. When the onions are turning translucent and falling apart at the poke of a ladle and the carrots and potatoes are round-cornered, it ought to be done. Taste the broth. It should taste like chicken and onions. If you made this with boneless skinless chicken you deserve the tasteless travesty you got.

Take the lid out and using tongs or other appropriate implements, fish the chicken out and place it on a plate to cool. Remove and discard skin. Shred the now-tender meat off the bones and toss it back in the pot. Discard bones once you're sure you haven't wasted any chicken.

Turn heat down to low, and leave the cover off. Leave the soup to simmer for about half an hour.

Ladle large helpings of the soup over the cubed tomato, in big-sized bowls, and sprinkle the chopped greens on top (if you wanted them.) Don't forget to take the bag of peppercorns out, unless you want someone trying to eat it.

Author's notes: I have no idea why it's called ABC soup. It's been called that in my family since I was a little girl.

Lolth's Marinade for Pork Sacrifice, by Lolth

Originally posted to women's RPG forum maintained by yours truly.

Pork. Lots of it. I just put 8 lb. of pork into marinade.

Lemon juice
Pureed tomato
Basil (dry)
Onion powder
Red bell pepper powder
Garlic powder
Mint (dry)
Rosemary (dry)
Oregano (dry)
Cooking oil (lots of it)

Mix everything together to make paste. Spread on pork bits and let marinade for 4 to 24+ hours.

Sacrificial glaze (spread over pork just before holding it over fire or heat):
Red balsamic vinegar
Rice vinegar
Basil (dry)
Onion powder
Red bell pepper powder
Garlic powder
Mint (dry)
Rosemary (dry)
Oregano (dry)
Cooking oil (lots of it)

Eat and enjoy.

Lolth's Flammable and Patience-Requiring Pork Chop Marinade, by Lolth

Originally posted to women's RPG forum maintained by yours truly: Pork chops, lots of 'em. 4 or 5 lbs will do.

Ghee (quite a lot of it; you want it runny in this phase)
Rice vinegar
Lemon juice
Sunflower/canola oil
Fresh garlic cloves, crushed (to taste; I use lots of garlic)
Red bell pepper powder
Cayenne pepper powder
Black pepper, crushed
Rosemary (dried)
Mint (dried)
Onion powder
Pureed tomato

Mix to paste. Spread some on pork chops, one side only; put chops into the fridge and let them settle for 45 minutes, so ghee hardens and forms a crust. Flip the porkers over carefully, minding the crust, and spread more on the other side. Again, let the chops rest for 45 minutes. Repeat until you got no pork chops left.

Note: the bit about "Flammable" is not a joke. Remember, ghee is purified butter, and is used in some places of Nepal for lamp oil as well. This, however, gives a great flavor if you're using an electric barbeque, as it bursts into fire now and then and gives a delicious smoke aroma to your food...

However, you want to keep an eye on your barbeque and not turn your back to it.

Spider's Nectarine Surprise, by Lolth

8 - 10 nectarines
1,5 desilitres of sugar (appr. 135 grams)
4 desilitres of water
5 cl Galliano vanilla liquor

Cinnamon powder
Grated nutmeg

First, get rid of the peels on nectarines. This is easily achieved by pouring boiling water on top of nectarines and letting them soak for five minutes, then quickly dunking them into cold water and rubbing the surface after making a small cut. Halve the nectarines, get rid of the huge seed, and then cut to slices. While you're doing this, put sugar and water into a coated/teflon kettle, and put on boil; the syrup should bubble when you dunk in the sliced nectarines.

Lower the temperature, and let the nectarines boil for 10 minutes. Turn off the heat, pull the kettle partially aside, and pour in vanilla liquor. Let soak for five.

Put into bowls (5 or 6), and sprinkle both cinnamon and nutmeg over fruits and syrup.

Serve warm.

Lolth's Extraordinary Chicken, by Lolth

Originally posted to women's RPG forum maintained by yours truly.

1 chicken/chick

100+ grams of smoked/smoke-aroma greasy bacon, chopped
1 smallish leek, chopped fine
150 grams of shiitake mushrooms, chopped
a drop of cooking oil/butter
couple of slices of wheat bread or whole-grain bread, fresh, crumbled
3/4th of Granny Smith apple
some dried sage and oregano
a slosh of red balsamic vinegar

Start frying the bacon in oil/butter, add mushrooms and leek when bacon starts to fry for real. Add apple and rest of the stuff except balsamic vinegar, and when everything's suitably mushy, drip in the balsamic vinegar and mix, leave to cool.

Scrubba-dub-lube (to taste):
couple of large spoonfuls of butter/ghee
canola/sunflower/whatever cooking oil
garlic powder
red bell pepper powder
onion powder
tumeric powder
ground black pepper
a teaspoonful or two of runny honey
apricot brandy

Mix everything in a small kettle, and leave beside warm stove (after doing the stuffing, that is); mix well, and scrub on chicken, who surely will appreciate it.

Put into oven (150-180 C), and roll it over now and then and scrub more scrubba-dub-lube on the chicken.

After about an hour or so, take the chicken out, turn heat up to 225, turn the breast side up, rub with scrubba-dub-lube, add breadcrumbs, and slather with butter. Put the chicken back until interesting colors show up on breadcrumbs (if it is smoking black, you kept it there too long).


Chicken Quesadillas by Shewolf

1lb chicken breast, bonless & skinless
2pkg large burrito shells
either taco bell sauce packs, OR a taco sauce of your choice
shredded mexican-style cheese

Cook breasts in a crock-pot for 8 hrs on low. Remove from crock, and shred. Place into saucepan with the taco sauce (when I first made these, all I had was a huge pile of hot and medium taco bell sauce packs. Tasted perfect) stirring as you add sauce. You don't want a soup. Cook until warm.

Take a skillet, lightly grease with butter or oil, and set on med-lo to med heat. Place chicken onto half a burrito, add cheese, fold, then place into skillet, using a saucer to hold down the burrito (until the cheese melts enough to hold it together). Flip, and cook until nicely browned. Either slice with a pizza cutter, or serve whole.

Depending on how stingy you are with the meat, and how hungry people are, serves 4-24 people.

"My Ramen will sneak into your Ramen's house at night, and fucking kill it" ramen by Amado G

1 Packet Ramen (preferably Chicken)
1 Bottle Sriracha chile sauce, do NOT substitute
1 Key lime

To perform as originated by Mr. G, boil water in a nalgene in your local microwave. This should take about a minute. As you do so, pour ramen noodles, flavor packet, Sriracha sauce, and key lime juice into a sealable bowl. When the water finishes boiling, pour enough water to cover, but not totally innundate the ramen. Seal the bowl, then, wait three minutes.

Eat, I prefer using chopsticks.

Mike's Curry by Jezrael

My contribution: This is how I make curry.
Soy Sauce
Worcester Sauce
3 Tablespoon butter or margerine
2 Cloves Garlic, Diced
3 teaspoons Curry Powder //I usually use a mix of different kinds//
1/2 teaspoon Garam Masala
1/2 Onion, Chopped
1/2 Green Pepper, Chopped
1 to 1 and 1/2 pounds of your preferred meat, cubed //I prefer Chicken or Pork//
1 can Lite Coconut Milk OR 1 can Beef Broth OR 1 pint nonfat yogurt
1 wok
2 cups cooked rice

Corn Starch for thickness
Other vegetables for taste

First things first, marinate the meat in a mixture of soy sauce and worcestershire sauce for about 20-30 minutes.

Melt the butter in the wok and saute the diced garlic until brown, you may want to add a bit of the diced onion (but not all of it) at this point as well. Once the garlic is browned add in the curry powder and masala and saute it for a bit as well to release the flavors, not too long or the curry will burn and stick to the wok, use your best judgement on that part. Take whatever liquid you've decided to use and pour it into the wok, bring it to just at boiling and then reduce the heat to a simmer. Add the meat AND the marinade. Stir occasionally. The meat should be done within 20-30 minutes. Depending on whether you like your veggies soft or crunchy you could add them in as you add the meat or wait. I usually wait until the meat is about half-cooked to add my veggies. When the meat is done so is the curry. It will have varying consistancy depending on what liquids you used, so you may want to use some starch or other thickener to thicken the mix up. The yogurt makes the thickest sauce...the broth the thinnest. Pour the sauce over rice and enjoy!

I sometimes add tomatoes early in the cooking so that they break down and give a more tangy final taste to the sauce. I imagine you could also further reduce the heat and reduce the sauce to thicken it, but I'm usually too hungry to try. This can serve 2-4 people. It's not an exact doubling for 4-8 people, especially with the curry powder. Also you could substitute something less fattening for the butter, canola oil maybe?


A variant of Karelian roast, by Lolth

This is slightly more artery-friendly than my gran's original recipe, plus it has veggies in it.

Main ingredients:
2 lb. of beef (fairly lean, and you can use cheapest parts for this)
2 lb. of pork (somewhat greasy, and cheapest parts are the best)
1 1/2 cups of water
a decent-sized chunk of butter (about 4 oz)
a bottle (quart-sized or slightly bigger) of ale

Optional stuff (for each two ingredients added, add 1/4 cup of water):
1-2 carrots, diced
1-2 onions, sliced
1 small root celery, diced
small swede/turnip, diced
1 lb. of lamb (cheap bits)

Spices: salt
black pepper (whole), rose pepper (whole)
2 bay leaves
dried rosemary


Preheat the oven to 480 F/250 C. Take a largish iron or clay pot (which has a lid); the pot has to be able to withstand lots of heat.

Dice the meat. Try to make them even-sized bits, but 's okay if you can't.

Fry the meat on a skillet (or in a pot), using half of butter, until it has changed color, and no longer dribs reddish fluids; before this, tuck in any veggies you fancy so they get a good whirl around as well.

Dump in spices and the rest of butter (spices to taste; you can always add more salt later, so it is not a bad idea to be stingy with it at this point). Note that the ale is added later. Do not put it in at this point.

Put the pot into the oven without the lid. Roast for 30 minutes, and at 15 minutes mark take a ladle and pull the pot out just enough to give it a good stir.

At 30 minute mark, lower temperature down to 390 F/200 C, and again, let the entire thing to stew for 30 minutes.

Take the pot out, stir, pour in ale. Put the lid on. Lower the temperature of the oven down to 350 F/175 C, and let it stew for 1 - 2 hours.

Check the flavor somewhere in mid-roasting, and if the roast looks a bit dry (the level of fluids should be just a bit below level of stuff), add some water.

Serve with whole boiled potatoes, salad, carrots, etc.

Bogies and Rice, by Lolth

This dish was originally served in my school; it was one of the favorite foods, and no one wanted to miss the day when it was served. It was called as "Chinese pork stew" on menu, but since it is a school cafeteria food, of course it needs to be called with a suitable nickname. And due to yellowish color... well, bogies and rice is quite obvious. I've recreated the recipe with extra flavor and bells and whistles, but I've noticed two things about this dish:
1) You can't make a small amount of it -- it just doesn't taste the same. So bring out the biggest kettle and make lots of it. This food keeps well (in this household of two it lasted for a week).
2) You have to serve it with long-grained white, slightly sticky rice. Jasmin, Basmati, short-grain... no, none of them will do, I've tried. It just doesn't taste as good as it does with long-grained rice. When you cook the rice, let it overcook a bit, so the texture gets smushed and it soaks the food's flavor better.

For eight to ten civilized eaters, or six to eight hogs or for two for a week.

Main ingredients:
800 grams of cheap pork, cubed or sliced (stewing process plus pineapple will turn it really tender)
2 red bell peppers, cut to bits
2 yellow bell peppers, cut to bits
2 green bell peppers, cut to bits
2 leeks, halved, then cut to bits
2-3 big yellow onions
garlic to taste (preferrably lots of it), cut to ittybitty bits
1-2 cans of crushed pineapple in juice (syrup will not do!)
1-2 cans of bamboo shoots, sliced
1-2 carrots shred or cut to bits

Chinese fivespice
Powdered red bell pepper
Cooking oil (peanut is the best, followed by sunflower and canola oil)
1 1/2 - 2 litres of water

Served with long-grained slightly-glutinous rice.

Sweet and sour base:
3-5 tablespoonfuls of potato flour 1 1/2 desilitres of water 6 tablespoonfuls of rice vinegar 8 tablespoonfuls of sugar 3 tablespoonfuls of soy sauce 3 tablespoonfuls of Worcestershire sauce

Chop up onion and garlic, fry lightly (but do not let them to brown) in a generous slosh of cooking oil. Use a large (3 to 5 litre kettle for this -- no reason why you should dirty more dishes than you have to, because the rest of the dish is done in the same kettle).

Add meat, keep frying until meat looks suitably done and no longer leaks red fluids.

Add fivespice, bell pepper powder, tumeric, curry and salt; the mixture should look similar to happily yellow sewage.

Add water, carrots and crushed pineapple plus its juice.

Let boil and bubble for 45 - 55 minutes.

(After this point, it is a good idea to put the rice kettle on, so the rice is ready when the sauce is ready as well.)

Add bell peppers and leek into the kettle. Let boil for 15 minutes, then add bamboo shoots. Let boil for 10 minutes more.

Mix the sweet and sour base in a large cup, making sure that everything's smoothly blended together and there are absolutely no lumps anywhere. Then pour the sauce base into the kettle and stir vigorously so it doesn't have time to lump. Allow the sauce to boil something like 5 minutes, or until suitably thick. Check the flavor, add salt if necessary and serve with rice.

Meatloaf, Asian Flavor, by Brandi

The original recipe was in Accents of the Orient by Susan Grodnick, but it's changed somewhat as I made it more and more.

2lbs ground beef (turkey is usable, but blander)
2 cloves garlic, minced or grated
2 teaspoons fresh grated gingerroot (I usually peel and grate a piece about the size of my thumbtip)
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/4 cup hoisin sauce
1/4 teaspoon black pepper (or to taste)
4-6 green onions, chopped (maybe more if wilted bits have to be removed)
Enough breadcrumbs (I know that's imprecise, see below)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix together the meat and wet ingredients in a bowl. Add breadcrumbs until the mix coheres into a nice lump without feeling too wet (ie there shouldn't be egg white or hoisin sauce sloshing around). I probably end up using about a cup of breadcrumbs, but as I'm pouring them straight into the mix I can't be precise.

Put the mix in a greased loaf pan (9" x 5"), and optionally brush the top with extra hoisin sauce. Bake until cooked through, about 50 minutes.

Tips and Variations:
If you've got one of those piston measuring cups Alton Brown so loves, it's the best way to measure and dispense the thick hoisin sauce.

Tonkatsu sauce makes a sweeter alternative to hoisin sauce.

Two Chinese pork sausages (the little pre-cooked kind you find in Asian markets) can be chopped fine in a mini food processor and added to the meat. This is especially good for adding flavor to a loaf based on ground turkey.

Kickass vinaigrette, by Teucer

1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar 2 tablespoons sesame oil 1 chile japones (or to taste) 1 teaspoon Chinese hot mustard 1 dash ground ginger (optional)

Saute the chile in the sesame oil until it begins to brown. Then remove the oil from the heat and take out the pepper. Wait for the oil to cool, and then put it and all the other ingredients into a small jar. Close tightly and shake vigorously. Shake well before serving.

Author's notes: The recipe doesn't make a lot, but you don't want to overdo this one; it packs a wallop. It's meant to be served on steak, though other meat would work fine.

Buttermilk biscuits made really, really easy, by Teucer

2 cups flour 1 teaspoon baking powder 1/3 stick salted butter (aka 1/6 cup) buttermilk as needed

Stir the flour and baking powder together. With floured hands, work in the butter, breaking it up into small pieces. Then add buttermilk, a little bit at a time, working it in (with your hands; the only reason they should be remotely clean at the end is because the dough tastes good enough for you to lick it off your fingers) until you have an even-consistency dough, about the texture of bread dough. Form into biscuits of the desired size. I'm a fan of "cat head" biscuits - those that, when risen, are roughly the size of the head of a cat. I've never heard anyone use that term in real life, but it rocks and I'm told it used to be more common. This recipe makes four of those, depending on the size of the cat. For smaller biscuits, you might stretch it to six or even eight.

Bake at 450 (and make sure it's a real 450; in the dorm kitchens here that means setting the oven for close to 500) until it's golden on top. (That's about 15-20 minutes.) Ideally you won't have temperature-regulation issues burning the bottom a little and leaving the centers slightly doughy, but even if you do they are incredibly tasty.