Editing Forgotten Freedom:Mess Hall Rules

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== Rules for the Mess Hall ==

When dining in the mess hall the following suggestions and guidelines and pieces of information have been carved in a stone tablet nailed to the doors.

1. Leave your weapons outside the mess, a roomy rack has been prepared for such... Michael, please do not take this as a cue to try and balance a weapon upon any female crewmember's chest while they are standing outside the mess, or reach into their blouses or breastplates looking for your sword.

2. Please, no poison in the mess unless it comes through the Kitchen first.

3. Please, do not start a food fight on chili night... a bowl of chili is as effective as two flasks of acid.

4. Thirds is the limit on refills. The portions are pretty big as it is.

5. Grog is the only drink on the menu, everything else is strictly Bring Your Own Drink. Any water, spirits, or potions within reason are aCool Cthulhueptable in this vein. Elixirs of fire breathing are discouraged.

6. Please don't ask if the Captain is having a different meal than everyone else.

7. Scrolls and wands are considered in the same league as weapons, a cabinet is outside for their storage while dining.

8. Meals can be taken in your quarters on request via the sign-up sheet next to the kitchen door.

9. Break a plate, or break a conceivable rule above, and you are on bus boy and dish duty for a week.

10. Special menu items can be made available on request, please speak to the cooky.

11. Several crew members are sneaky enough or have sufficiently flexible anatomy to steal plates from under peoples noses, so watch your meal.

12. If you don't know what's in the dish, you don't want to.

13. You are not to run away screaming like you just saw Khyber himself when the cook says "We're having leftovers".

14. When the menu says "Mystery Meat", not even the cook knows what it is.

15. The Cooky is no longer allowed to institute "Corn and Mayonnaise" day... ever again... on pain of liquid keelhauling followed by a month's worth of latrine duty. (Sweet Holy Khyber, Man!!! What WERE you thinking?!?!?)