Last words spoken

We are with only the three of us now, Kevin, Sleipnir and me.
Kevin is the last of my youth squat that I was training who is still alive. It is all weighing hard on him, I can see it in his eyes. Though if you see him walking like this alert, ready you wouldn’t say it. But I know this boy, well he is not a boy anymore he reached his 18th birthday I think a month ago.

Time made him anxious he said. He doesn’t want to know how long ago the war started, or how long we have been traveling like this. It is okey, I keep track. He doesn’t have to. He just needs to focus on walking, breathing and be ready for anything.
We barely speak, it is not needed we developed a way of communicating with clicks we make with our tongues and teeth. Noticed that the predators don’t react to it.
Looking to the bright green sky you can see the sun it is time to make camp. A few short clicks. Kevin raises his hand in an affirmative and starts to circle out slowly looking for a sheltered place to stay.

We can keep moving in the night that is no problem. The nights are not that dark anymore the green hue in the sky kind of make everything glow. But it is better to keep a schedule a routine for ourselves. Routine keeps the insanity away.
I stay with Sleipnir to the side of the path we were walking keeping an eye on anything that moves. Nothing should move anymore.
Kevin and I are looking for survivors but so far, we are not successful we found dying people. But no survivors. We found people that we had to put out of their misery, people that had gone rabid, people that just turned evil. No survivors.
Kevin comes back I see him signaling that its clear to move.
With a single click I lead Sleipnir with me to where Kevin is. Kevin points to a few tents that had been set up it looks ragged unpractical, but it stands. Inside I hear sounds. With a raised eyebrow I look at Kevin and he signals 2 survivors. No 1 survivor. One dying. I nod.
Moving in I see two pair of eyes looking at me. A woman and child. A little girl. The woman has clear signs of poisoning.
The problem is with the war. The fighting became dirty quickly, energy centers were attacked which caused horrible, radiated blasts poisoning the land and the air. And on top of that another city developed a biochemical agent.
Infecting people quickly It spread so fast amongst the humans. The animals were not infected, thankfully. Plants adjusted quickly but we humans not most that survived the violence. They got sick.
The problem with this agent. It doesn’t really kill. It just alters your brain chemistry. You can fight it pretty long. Like probably this mother, motivated by her daughter to keep her sanity. But you can see it eating at someone.
The twitches the long stares at someone. The hungry look or angry look.
This woman had it. I nod put my back down and squat down in front of them. Looking at them carefully. The girl speaks. I’m not a fan of speaking nowadays. It is a sound predators are attracted to. Cause only we make those sounds.
Food.

But the girl is smart she talks soft. She says they are hungry couldn’t go out for food in a while since her mom is sick. I nod and point to Kevin
“he has food, is preparing it now.”
The girl looks with sparkly happy eyes at me as if I told her, I would give her a pony unicorn with wings and shitting rainbows. But I guess in these times prepared food can be just as good. The girl moves away to Kevin and I keep in my position in front of the mother. I stare at her right in the eyes. You can see the madness boiling, coiling. Yeah, she isn’t going to take long Somewhere she is giving up she knows her daughter is safe with us. She is giving in.
I nod to her stand up and make a clicking sound to Kevin. He knows what I am about to do. He will keep the girl with him and safe.
I take the mother out back. I give her my energy weapon and place it against her head my voice sounds hoarse but that is because I barely speak.
“On your own terms. Or mine.”
A relieved look, she must have seen what the madness does to people. And what it makes them do. She pulls the trigger with a smile.
There isn’t much loose dirt here, so I pile some rubble on top of the body.
Clean my gun. Go back in. I am hungry.
Kevin is sitting there with the girl they softly speak. He is explaining to her that I went outside with her mother because she is very sick and see if there was something I could do. I hate lying like this, but it softens the blow a bit.
When I come in, I look down and I think sad. Shaking my head.
Kevin makes sure she sees it and then continues.
“It couldn’t be helped. Sometimes people are too sick. I’m sorry.”
Ugh I am sorry. I am sorry for shit. We didn’t do this. We are just cleaning up the shitshow.
I get angry and go to Sleipnir he deserves to be taken care of. Making sure the dirt is out of his coat.
Don’t know how long I have spent Kevin and the girl had brought me food before it would go cold. I got a hug from the little girl. She reached my hips small thing. I’m sure she was born just after the war started. Lack of nutrition was showing. Can’t blame the mother she has kept them both alive as long as she has.
After a while the food was already gone and the sky had turned a glowing green. I heard Kevin his voice.
That startled me, and Sleipnir. We both look up and search where the sound came from.
With quick paces I move out gun in hand I see Kevin standing on the road. Or well the remnants of a road. I look at him questioningly he points to the girl who is trying to pat a dang lynx. While in her shrill voice saying “kitty kitty.” Ah fuck this… the Lynx enjoys the attention of course. Dang cats. Then the lynx jumps away I see Kevin crouch and so do I. A pack of dire wolves. You can hair their claws scraping the concrete and stones.
We try to get the attention of the girl she slowly turns. Then her eyes go big and she starts to scream.
Don’t know what happened it was a split second decision. But I shoot the girl. To much noise she won’t only attract the wolves but worse.
Kevin has already a weapon in hand and ready to defend himself. If he wants to get back to shelter we need to fight of these beasts.
The fighting starts. We work towards each other. Until we can stand shoulder to shoulder. Or back to back. Since the wolves are circling us.
Then the realization comes. I feel it in the tension of his muscles. Kevin is done. I push him behind me further and start to shoot. Knives won’t work here. To big of beasts compared to the small blades. Just ranged combat.
They were with many and all that is left now a smoldering heap of fur, meat blood and guts.
Kevin is sitting on the ground looking at me. He shows me his shoulder and neck.
The feeling I got was like a jagged knife in my guts. He was bitten, and the poison is coursing through his body already. You can see the veins.
I refuse to cry. Refuse to shout, scream.
Picking up Kevin I take him to the shelter. Leaving the heap of wolves what it is. The lynx returned and starts to sniff the pile of bodies.
Yeah cats.
When I lay him down on his sleeping bag he already started shivering. Blood loss. Fever, infection. It won’t take long.
His hands are to shaky and he drops his own gun. I help him.
He nods “Say it. “
Looking at him for a while I then speak my voice cracking a bit.
“on your own terms, or mine.”

And I point the barrel of the gun to the side of his head. With the last willpower he had he kept his hand steady enough and shot.
No hesitation. He just did it.
The next day I bury my friend, my trainee. Kevin. I bury him in a pile of rubble. Leaving one set of dog tags with him. The other I take with me. He is joined with the rest. Keeping them in a satchel rolled up tight.
At that point I had not realized yet, that the last words I spoke to Kevin, were the last words I would speak ever.