Forgotten Freedom:Chuck Jarlot Rules
Chuck Jarlot's rules starting at 0
0000) I am Chuck Norris.
0001) Roundhouse Kicks must always strike someone in the face.
0002) Also Roundhouse Kicks are automatically critical hits.
0003) That deal triple damage.
0004) Make that quadruple damage.
0005) Screw it, just make it quintuple damage.
0006) Save vs. Massive damage are always required against roundhouse kicks.
0007) Actually saves vs. massive damaged are required whenever I hit you.
0008) No, it doens't matter how hard I hit you.
0009) I am Chuck Norris.
0010) From this point forward, any keelhauling offense is now punished with a roundhouse kick.
0011) ...to the face.
0012) My tears can cure any illness.
0013) Too bad I never cry.
0014) From this point forward we do not read books.
0015) We stare them down until they tell us everything they know.
0016) For this reason it is not advisable to look too closely at any of Volrath's books.
0017) I do not sleep.
0018) I wait.
0019) There are no longer any pirates or ninjas on this ship.
0020) Only cowboys.
0021) Remember, if you can see me, I can see you.
0022) If you can't see me you may be only seconds from death.
0023) I eat Norbaz's chili to cure heartburn.
0024) I have never blinked in my life.
0025) Never.
0026) I invented water.
0027) I have two speeds, Walk and Kill.
0028) I am Chuck Norris.
0029) There is no chin under my beard.
0030) Just another fist.
