Plot outline

Alright. I've outlined the script and plot (thanks to some suggestions I got) and this is my idea for the various acts.

Act 1

Introduces the story and characters. Shows Gil and Shamat's connection as well as Ishtar's goal to have Gil as her personal boy-toy. The act will also introduce the other gods as they all basically discuss how to deal with Gilgamesh. My idea here is to portray the gods in a more negative sense then that of Hercules without declaring them as "the bad guys". Basically they're an incredibly inept group of world leaders who fuss over tiny details and the problem of Gil (which is rather large mind you) is mostly dodged or ignored with mindless bickering. The main person who will worry about Gil will be his mother Ninsun.

Ninsun will implore Ea (or Enki, however you decide to pronounce it) that Gilgamesh is a good person and that the only thing he lacks in life is a true friend (awwwwwwww) so Ea will speak of a man who can help Gilgamesh. Behind Ninsun's back, Enki will tell Anu that the man he's sending in will in fact DESTROY Gilgamesh.

Act 2

Act 2 introduced Enkidu as he attacks a local farmer. My assumption will basically be that the farmer will walk in with a lantern, wonder what's going on and then realize he's surrounded by a group of wild animals. They move out of the way to reveal a tall standing wild man. With one grunt the farmers lantern will go out.

Cutting back to the Palace. Shamat will be talking to Ishtar as the goddess will ask what "Gilgamesh's greatest love" is. Shamat will sarcastically respond that "The only thing Gilgamesh loves in this world is power and money." Ishtar will be intrigued by this and disappear right as Gilgamesh enters with a black eye. Shamat will jokingly say to Gilgamesh that he deserved it and Gil will mostly shrug off the jabs until both are interrupted by the mad cry of a farmer who comes running into the palace, his clothing torn and his body scratched and bruised as he screams about a wild man.

Gilgamesh will rub his temples in annoyance and tell Shamat to go take care of it. Shamat will begrudgingly accept as she storms out of the Palace. In this scene we see more about Gilgamesh as he solemnly sings about his richness as a king and the emptiness of his heart.

Scene change to Shamat as she arrives at the edge of a forest, holds up a torch and starts to travel through the dark forest. All the while making snide comments about Gil. Eventually she'll encounter some wild animals and be saved by the curious Enkidu. Surprisingly Shamat will discover that Enkidu can, in fact, speak and will learn that he was made by Ea.

Shamat will then try and teach Enkidu about the civil world. Slowly winning the wild man's heart as he regrettably winds up taking to his animal friends about it (to which he finds most of them actually fairly annoying and stupid) to which Shamat eventually tells Enkidu about Gilgamesh and the man is puzzled and intrigued by the man's apparent prowess. So Shamat takes Enkidu to go see Gilgamesh.

The wedding scene happens and one of the men barges in right as Gilgamesh slams Enkidu's head into the ground (with his legs wrapped around his head no less) so as to have some embarrassing cover ups from both men. Shamat introduces Gilgamesh to Enkidu and vice/versa and the two begrudgingly shake hands.

It's in the next few scenes that Gilgamesh meets Ishtar and is met by her come-ons. Naturally Gil is a bit surprised and confused by the goddesses advances. However she has a bargaining chip that hooks Gil in. The promise of IMMORTALITY. She tells Gilgamesh of a pair of people who were granted immortality by the gods and that he could do the same if he met them.

Soon after he tells Shamat of his plan to find Utnapishtim and wishes for her to come along as he needs assistance. Unfortunately this causes Enkidu to come along as he does not wish to leave Shamat's side.

Act 3

Act 3 starts with Gilgamesh, Enkidu and Shamat traveling across hill and dale and several other grandiose locations toward their goal. During this time Shamat is forced to commune with Ishtar in the form of a pendant around her neck and show the goddess of their travels.

The first part has them entering the Cedar forest, Gil and Enkidu are both throwing snide comments each others way until they decide to camp out. In the middle of the night Gil has a dream about being buried under a pile of gold and several other metaphorical crap as he suddenly wakes up panting. He tells Enkidu, sitting across the fire, about the dream and Enkidu tries to provide some light on the matter by explaining how Gil's rich, the most powerful man in Uruk as well as a real hit with the ladies.

Gil chuckles and explains to Enkidu that not everything is so bright in Gil's world. This is interrupted by Shamat, getting up tiredly to rub her eyes and then being taken by Humbaba.

Gil and Enkidu work together to rescue Shamat from Humbaba and the demon pleads for them to spare his life. Enkidu and Gil have a small fight over it but Shamat is the one to finish it off as she steps on the now VERY SMALL demon. Angrily she explains how it called her a dog and she walks off.

We then see a (possible) song cue with Ishtar as she is shown as the true self righteous bitch she is as she basically yells at and demoralizes her past "lover" Duzumi. She basically admits to wanting Gil for his power, wealth and fame and decides that tonight is the night she will claim Gilgamesh's heart for her own.

Ishtar comes down and tempts Gilgamesh to the lake where she sexually starts to undress herself (or is suggested to anyway) and Gil, still confused about it all says he needs to go take a leak. Gil hides behind a tree and starts to think about he'll handle this. Deciding he'll accept her advances and come out to try and make her his queen. Since he is the son of a deity after all it only makes sense for him to make another Goddess his queen. But as Gil is about to go back he hears Ishtar screaming as Duzumi and being the bitch she actually is.

Change of plans, Gil sees through her and Ishtar is DUMPED.

What does she do? What every young spoiled teenage brat does when things don't go her way. She throws a temper tantrum to her father Anu about how she was dumped and that he should kill Gilgamesh for her. Anu doesn't want to do it at first but after some threats from Ishtar he reluctantly unleashes the bull of the heavens down to destroy Gilgamesh.

Cutting back to the trio. We go into another song cue as the three continue to travel and we see a small montage of how Enkidu is still growing attracted to Shamat while Gilgamesh and Enkidu are starting to increase their own bonds of friendship. When the song ends the three are recalling their past experiences like old friends. Some small conversation is had about why they want immortality but as the conversation gets to a climax they encounter a destroyed village.

There the Bull of the Heavens reveals itself and Gil and Enkidu work together to defeat it. After the long battle it goes to the kingdom of the gods as Anu brings all the other gods to order that the bull has been killed. The other gods are shocked and outraged that Gil and Enkidu would do this. Save for Ea and Ninsun who defend their children. Anu gets angry and tells Ea that Enkidu was suppose to kill Gilgamesh to which Ninsun is shocked and appalled.

Ishtar then appears and tells Anu that the only way for this atrocity to be done is for Enkidu's life to be taken. And so the other Gods agree, causing Ea and Ninsun to be mortified. Enkidu will die.

In the corner. Ishtar grins. First she takes Gil's best friend... then she shall take everything else.

Act 4

Act 4 starts with Enkidu giving Shamat flowers as a sign of love. Though she finds it sweet, Gilgamesh reminds them that Utnapishtim and his wife are just up ahead. When they meet the old couple (I picture them as an old bird and man who constantly squabble and re-iterate things that happened in their VERY LONG AGO youth) they basically tell Gilgamesh about the flood and that the thing that made them immortal was the plant under the ocean. They reveal their immortality by shedding their skin right in front of them and appearing as a pair of teenagers.

All the while Enkidu is coiffing mysteriously. As the banter continues Enkidu suddenly falls ill and they inspect him. Utnapishtim tells them that he's been cursed and that his life is to be taken. Gilgamesh, on his last hope, tells Shamat to take Enkidu out of here and to try and get him to a place where he'll be comfortable. Gilgamesh takes off his armor and travels into the ocean to swim for the plant. The one he plans to give to Enkidu in order for him to survive.

Gilgamesh gets the plant from the ocean floor but as he travels up and goes to Enkidu, he is suddenly ambushed by a group of men who he recognizes as his own guards. Gilgamesh is taken prisoner and sees Shamat and the sickly Enkidu are also imprisoned by his own men. When he demands to know what's going on Ishtar appears before him and tells Gilgamesh he has lost.

She smirks as she explains to Gilgamesh that because he refused her she has taken his city and is now in control of Uruk. When Gilgamesh demands to know how she found them and how she had those connections in the city Ishtar eyes Shamat and Gilgamesh and Enkidu yell at her for her betrayal.

Shamat breaks down and tells them she didn't want this to happen. Ishtar mocks her own priestess and comes out to tell her that Enkidu loves her. Gilgamesh tightens his grip on the plant but as he does he suddenly realizes it's being taken from his grasp. He turns to see a snake is eating the plant and Ishtar teases Enkidu that he should not have abandoned his animal friends as they have just ensured his own death.

In rage, Shamat manages to break free and punch Ishtar in the face. The goddess recovers and furiously is about to murder the woman. Gilgamesh breaks free and saves Shamat from Ishtar's wrath. Ishtar is suddenly confronted with a realization that Gilgamesh cares more for these pathetic mortals than her. She is enraged and confused and so she simply repeats that Gilgamesh has failed. She disappears.

Shamat and Gilgamesh go to Enkidu. Who tells Shamat that he loves her and who gives a tearful goodbye to Gilgamesh. Gil says that Enkidu was the only and best friend he ever had. The man dies in the arms of Shamat who cries over his body.

We then cut to Uruk under the rule of Ishtar as we find that things are actually much worse there. Ishtar's negative view of men, enhanced by her disapproval by Gilgamesh has caused her to practically turn all the men into her whipping victims. Causing several of the women there to become most upset over their husbands unfair treatment. One woman even confronts Ishtar about it and the goddess simply cries angrily at her that concepts like love are retarded concepts that only fools follow. The woman begrudgingly leaves with her child in her arms and says "I can't believe I'm saying this... but I miss Gilgamesh."

The sky is gray in the next scene as Gil and Shamat are mourning over their friends demise. Gil has lost everything now, his men, his country and even his best friend. He and Shamat have a fight in which they both basically unload on each other about themselves. This ends when Ea and Ninsun appear before the two and give them a hearty greeting.

Gil is reunited with his mother and she and Ea tell him and Shamat that things aren't good in Uruk under Ishtar's control but Anu can't do anything because Ishtar has him on a leash. Ea gives Gilgamesh a stone pillar like object with mystic runes inscribed on it. Gil questions what's the point in it all as he has lost Enkidu.

Ea tells him that the weapon can split the earth if he wants it to. Gilgamesh first acts uninterested but eventually hits the ground a few times to see if anything happens. Ea, sighing, grabs the weapon from him and launches a beam of energy at the ground. The rocks and earth split in two as the nether world opens up and Enkidu, covered in chains, rises from the ground.

There's a heartwarming reunion followed by an epic climax as Gilgamesh, Shamat and Enkidu return to the palace and confront Ishtar in the final and epic climax. Enkidu uses the Chains he gained from the nether world to bind the Goddess and during the fight Gilgamesh is thrown into his treasury.

He gets up and is greeted by his men who are willing to serve him. He asks why when he says just how much of an ass he was. They respond by revealing that they each have Ishtar's boot print on their asses. Gilgamesh accepts the offer and thinks of what they can do. Suddenly he sees the collection of swords he has and smiles to himself. Gilgamesh lets out only one line at this point "Hmmmm... perhaps I DO have enough swords..."

Meanwhile, Enkidu and Ishtar are in a tug of war as Enkidu tries to subdue the goddess and Ishtar warns Enkidu that he should have stayed dead. Ishtar breaks free, only to discover that all the solders of Gilgamesh have lined up at the gate of the city and each one has strung a sword into their bow. Gilgamesh gives the command and each sword is fired in succession at Ishtar as they each strike her body.

Fire starts to spew from her form as she grabs Gilgamesh and raises him into the sky. She takes on her "final form" and snarls at the man who defied her beauty. Gilgamesh says "I'm good at breaking hearts! Among other things!" and he launches the power of Ea's weapon at the ground at her feet. Ishtar looks to see that the ground has opened up to reveal the netherworld. She questions why Gilgamesh did something so useless and mocks him. Only for Enkidu to appear on her shoulder and wrap his chain around her neck. Gilgamesh punches Ishtar in the face and sends the woman colliding down into the netherworld.

The entire tower starts to collapse with her as everyone flees. Gil, Enkidu and Ishtar all fall with the tower as the goddess is thrown into the nether world. Shamat runs through the ruins of Gilgamesh's castle and finds Gil coming up out of the rubble looking beaten but alive. The two look to Enkidu and gasp as he lies on the ground. Not moving...

Epilogue

Gilgamesh is standing solemnly in a dark tuxedo as he speaks the following lines. "It is with a heavy heart we have gathered hear today... I know this is a deep... and emotional time for all of us... much is lost... but a truly... great thing was lost today... a great man..."

It pans out to show him lowering his head and holding his hands in front of him.

"SO NOW I PRONOUNCE YOU MAN AND WIFE!"

Enkidu and Shamat walk toward each other, both in wedding garb, and kiss as everyone around cheers for the couple and the party begins. Enkidu, with Shamat resting on his arm, moves to Gil and asks.

"So what was that about losing a great man?"

"You're MARRIED dude. Trust me, a great man has indeed been lost."

Enkidu shakes his head as the party continues. Basically allowing one to wrap things up with minor side characters and other such things. I'd imagine Enkidu and Gilgamesh would comment about the snake who ate the plant and suggest snake skin boots.

So afterwards Enkidu would talk to Ea about him being meant to kill Gilgamesh. But Ea will explain that he was, in fact, working for Ninsun the entire time and made Enkidu to be Gil's greatest companion.

"So you're a triple agent?"

"Technically Quadruple since Ishtar wanted you to be a girl who looked just like her. I didn't go ahead, of course, BUT DAMN that girl knew how to please a man!"

Enkidu chuckles then looks about.

"Where IS Gilgamesh?"

Ninsun walks over.

"I saw him with Shamat."

Gilgamesh is seen hitting on Shamat. Enkidu barges in, he grabs Gilgamesh and puts him through the same finishing move he did the first time they fought. Cue credits.