Editing TheStarsAreRight:CarlNote5

* [[TheStarsAreRight:RedlandJack|Return to Redland Jack's page]]

REDLAND

OOC- We'd talked a bit about maybe moving some things along a bit through email. If that's not the plan, let me know, and I'll shut it down and save it for next month!

IC-
 
Redland looks up suddenly from his study of one of Boris's diagrams. "Carl, I... I hesitate to bring this up, since you've so graciously agreed to let me off the hook and make the, er, sacrifice yourself. However, while under the influence of ... uh, whatever that stuff was, an idea came to me that, unfortunately, seemed like it might make some sense."
 
He stands up and paces uneasily, then continues, "I was thinking that something that I value quite highly, is my independence... you know, my, uh, my ability to walk away from... from all this, if I so choose... and since I'm the guy who really pushed to make this bargain, maybe it is fitting that I'm the one who pays the price. If that, uh, if that makes any sense at all."
 
He sits back down again and stares intently at the diagram.

CARL

OOC- sorry for the delay, I think moving things in email is a good idea.  --Chaz

- - - 

Carl is surprised by the outburst.  He frowns, looking at Jack for a moment.

"I --"  He stops, thinks a bit, then starts again.

"Jack, I put you on the spot out there.  True, you asked for the job, at least
you asked *about* it, back when we were talking hypothetically, but I 
hardly think it's fair to say that you pushed for this.   

"It doesn't seem to me that I'd be letting you off the hook for anything.
The Dark Pharaoh came to speak to me.  It's the King of Life It wants 
to bargain with.  How can I not be the one to offer up the price?

"Already we're trying to skirt around the edge of that offer, play a tricky
balancing act with our sovereignty.  That you were willing to stand up 
to speak on my behalf is something for which I'm grateful -- but I 
cannot simply let others -- you -- take the fall, at least not without being 
damned sure you know what you're getting into -- and that I know why 
you're doing it.

"So, what are you thinking?  What are you offering?  Are you doing it 
for me?  For yourself?  For a cause?  And why?"

Carl watches Jack's face, intent, his voice soft, then waits.

REDLAND

When Carl starts asking questions, Redland picks up his omnipresent notepad and jots down a couple of notes to himself to organize his thoughts. After pausing several moments, as if unsure himself of the answers, he smiles wryly.
 
"Well, I hate to lead with this one, but:
 
1) making the offer presumably raises your estimation of me. This is valuable to me, insofar as my association with you offers me access to knowledge that I cover." He continues excitedly, "These drawings of Boris's promise incredible insights into psychology. Studying the Fae, communicating with the Outsiders... fascinating. Just think of what could be done. The social sciences could move forward at an unprecedented rate..." He trails off sheepishly...
 
"2) You, and those associated with you, seem much more altruistic than I am. There's a good chance you'll take the sacrifice upon yourself, even if it makes more sense to dole it out to someone else. Alternatively, the Dark Pharaoh may only accept a sacrifice from the King of Life. Either way, I get to have my cake and eat it to... I look like a good guy at no cost to me.
 
"3) I've lost my job. I'm so poor that I could barely afford to buy Roxanne hair pins for Valentine's Day. I'm probably homeless, though I'm afraid to contact anyone back home. I've been less than useless so far on our journey. In particular, my conduct at Bailey was disgraceful. I mean, even I have my pride. If I'm going to mooch off your goodwill, I'd like to contribute something.
 
"4) After three bad reasons, I do have one, objectively good reason. If I make the sacrifice instead of you, it puts more distance between you and the transaction, which, as I understand it, is the reason to use an intermediary in the first place."
 
Redland takes a breath and continues.
 
"Am I doing it for you? You seem like a nice guy, but I've known you less than three weeks. For a cause? Saving the world is a worthy cause, but I'd certainly be better off if someone else would do it for me. I guess I'm doing it for me, even though I don't really want to do it. Maybe because I don't want to do it. As to what I'm offering," he laughs, "heck, perhaps the whole thing is moot. 
 
"I suppose I'd be offering to take up the cause. To make a good faith effort to save the world from the evil influences of Outside forces. To stick with it, even if feel endangered and want to go back to researching the gold standard. Something like that, but, you know, more eloquently stated."
 
He stops and smiles in his typical self-deprecating way, unsure if he should have spoken as he has.

CARL

Carl sighs, faint hint of what might be a smile on his lips.

"That was ... very eloquent, Jack,' he says.  "And thoughtful.  Thank you."

He shifts his shoulders and leans in, more serious now.

"I believe you are correct in your four points, though there are 
some implications that you may not have considered. For one, 
I don't want you or anyone else to offer themselves on my behalf;
and that very fact makes your offer more ... appropriate and more
valuable. So much so, that the likelihood of you being an acceptable
sacrifice is in direct proportion to the wholeheartedness with which
you pledge -- and I accept -- your life and service, knowing that I
must then turn around and offer you up to Him.  It.

"But if you offer that service to me in advance, then you cannot 
offer it in the binding.  All you have then -- all I have -- is to play
you like a token and offer you to the pact.  

"But if you do not offer that service to me, then you would be offering 
your freedom and service to the pact -- and by extension, to the
Pharaoh.  I don't know if that would make you Its tool, rather than 
one in the service of the FIght, but it seems likely.  I also do not
know whether that makes your offer unacceptable, because it
no longer binds the King of Life.

"We don't know what happens to the binding objects.  We don't 
know if they are destroyed in the making of the pact.  You might 
die; you might be tied in body and soul to something of the 
Pharaoh; you might be consumed somehow, or changed, and 
I have no way to know.

"Is that something you are willing to risk with open eyes?"

REDLAND

"Hmmmm. I'm not terribly interested in becoming a tool of evil. Death, enslavement, corruption. I don't know... my skepticism sometimes seems like a frail shield in the face of such powers. 
 
"With our current state of knowledge... I mean, even if my eyes are open, I'm still walking into darkness."
 
He shuffles uneasily.
 
"Well, certainly I wouldn't want to offer any service in advance. If the subsequent offering was rejected, I'd have done something that I would consider to be a large sacrifice, for, in some sense, nothing. 
 
"As to offering up service to the pact... I guess that's what I had in mind, but I certainly don't want to become somehow enslaved to the Dark Pharaoh. "
 
He looks down, shamefaced. "I hate to be a coward and rescind my offer, but maybe we should consider alternatives. I'm just ... I ... I'd be lying if I said I wasn't afraid." 

CARL

"We are all afraid, Jack," Carl says softly.  "I'm afraid all the time.
The Pharaoh in particular terrifies me."

He sits up straighter, then, and smiles, fanning his hands outward in a shrug

"But that is the nature of the battleground, isn't it?  I think the Pharaoh likes
it that way.  It plays with us as It does precisely because we are ignorant and 
afraid.  Or ignorant and *un*afraid, in which case we walk blithely into things
and get used up."  Carl snaps his fingers.

"Alternatives? Yes.  Before you spoke up, I was thinking of ... things to offer 
as bindings.  For all the reasons we've discussed, I don't dare offer anything 
truly personal, or anything too tightly bound to the Kingship.  But things of
value -- yes, those I have, things I really hate to lose.  I've sent for a couple 
of them, haven't decided which -- if any -- to offer yet.

"The trick here is to see what the Pharaoh offers, and to try to match its intent.
The Pharaoh has done this, oh, I don't know how many times.  This little 
contract, in and of itself is not so important to It.   It wants to see what we will 
do, to look for the chinks in our armor and make things 'interesting.'

"That's a problem, isn't it?  because It has all the experience."

REDLAND

"Hmmmm. If I understand correctly, what you are saying,  we should gather up as many potential 'sacrifices' as we can prior to the meeting. (Heck, we can even keep my offer in our back-pocket). Then, during the binding, we can see what the Dark Pharaoh selects as his sacrifice and, er, 'match up' accordingly. If we have an array of items we will be more likely to select one that is of the proper magnitude and 'kind'. 
 
"This seems like a good idea. Perhaps we could also check with the rest of our group and see if we can muster up any additional sacrifices."
 
"It is also my understanding that the three day deadline was a maximum. I wonder if we should we take the whole duration or make our move sooner. I guess, to some extent, we also need to figure out what our next move will be."