Forgotten Freedom:5001 5500
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5101 exemption from punishment for violation of rules 5095 and 5096 will hereby be extended to anyone involved in the recent scheming...
5102 Cabin boy is not the Boy Wonder.
5103 I know he does wondrous things, that's not what I'm referring to and you know it...
5104 Yeah he is an agile little sprite...well that's what cabin boys Do...
5105 WHAT!! US being Gay for each other does not make him my sidek... :bigeyes: !!! WE ARE NOT GAY FOR EACH OTHER!!!
5106 :rant:STOP SNICKERING!! THAT'S IT! Anyone referring to the cabin boy or the captain as being; gay for each other, the dynamic duo or any derivatives there of; will be dipped in holy water, tarred, feathered, liquid keelhauled, then keelhauled
5107 NO I would still be this sensitive about this if I wasn't bat...
5108 FOR THE LAST FRIGGIN TIME I AM NOT BATMAN!!!
5094. I am not allowed to screw around with time.
5095. We all know that Norbaz chilli is spiked, but can everyone stop taking credit for it?
5096. Musnt encourage a demon to possess the chilli.
5097. Terra, just because you have a thing for Lisa, that doesnt mean Devon and Michael will stop making passes at you.
5098. They make passes at just about anything humanoid and female.
5099. Just ask Michael about the medusa incident.
5100. Devons poetry is not to be used to interrogate prisoners.
5101. We do have -some- humanity, after all.
5102. Pholly is hereby forbidden to ferment the chilli.
5103. Next person to spike the coffee....dies.
5104. No trial.
5105. No appeal.
5106. DIES.
5107: Terra is no longer allowed to enter drinking contests. We simply don’t have the storage capacity.
5108: No, not even if you can make the stuff yourse-what? Seriously?
5109: I stick by 5107. I agreed to let you use the crew as guinea pigs, but NO ONE messes with MY booze.
5110. Lisa is not your own, personal Jesus.
5111. This means you, Michael.
5112. The captain, on the other hand....
5113. She isnt much on forgiving, either.
5114. She does hand out a lot of 'blessed beatings', though.
5115. Jaela is not, in any way, shape or form, the personal Jesus of anyone on this bucket.
5116. Yes, this means you.
5117. Until further notice, Norbaz' 12 alarm chili is food.
5118. It is not a weapon.
514- it is NOT the end of the world as we know it, and you do NOT feel fine
515- THIS IS NOT THE HMS PINAFORE
516 you cannot fly in Sharn
517 nor can you use a smole ladder to climb through sharn
518 you are NOT Long John Silver, even if you have a pet lobster and one leg
519 the first mate is not to be referred to as Mr. Arrow
520 iam not Captain Smallet
514- we do NOT reed to take the left turn at albaquerquie
5124: Pholly and Phollie are now two seperate entities.
5125: It is imaterial that we made up Phollie.
5126: Phollie is not made of straw.
5127: No, he does not need to see the wizard for a brain.
5128: Ketler, get to work on making Phollie a body before reality collapses and we all die.
5129: Ketler, read rule 5126, AGAIN!
5130: V, just because Terra commands hordes of animals and is apparently freaked out by very little, it does not mean you can refer to her as "fearless leader"
5131: Nor does she employ this "Moose and Squirrel" you keep talking about
5132: Well, ok, she probably does employ at least some members of those species, but that's beside the point
5133: No, Nalfien is not really a drow.
5134: No, he is not from Forgotten Realms.
5135: No, he is not Drizzt's older brother.
5136: No, he is not really dead.
5137: Him going to sigil Prep is not evidence that he can ingore canon material.
5138: No, the Gatekeepers do not run around in shaders and dark suits, using a flashing wand to erase our memories of the fact that abberrations live among us as normal people.
5139: Despite what Kithle claims.
5140: No, a race of gliding half-dragons that turn to stone during the day does not live in Sharn and protect the people.
5141: Even if they did, they would not have a friend on the watch who is a hot female half-drow inquisative.
5107. There will be no abberational armies allowed onboard the Forgotten Freedom from this point on.
5108. This applies to existing abberational armies.
5109. No, you won't have any problem with disposing of yours....
5110. You see, I assigned our chili chef to feed them.
5111. Yes, they're all dead.
5112. Yes, even the undead ones.
5113. I know you're vowing vengeance.
5114. What's the word I'm looking for? Oh yes, too bad.
5115. Michael is no longer allowed to flip out and kill everyone whom mentions his sister in a manner that can remotely be construed as sexual.
5116. I believe that's called taking a level in Berserker.
5117. There is no one allowed to mock the Captain's love poetry to Aerith.
5118. That includes dressing Jacob up as Aerith in order to get at the chocolate I buy for her.
5119. Marish is forbidden to eat it as well....
5120. Even if I can't stop her once she starts wagging her tail.
5121. Mickey Nine Fingers is forbidden from pulling out a shotgun and blowing the head off people whom come to him for problems that don't need his attention.
5122. Or just for the hell of it.
5123. Even if he bandages the wound.
5124. You shall not imply the Captain isn't Epic Level.
5125. You shall certainly not do that by wrapping him up in a burlap sack and beating him to test his hit points.
5126. The Captain does not need to prove his epic levels, he is simply that badass.
5127. The Captain DID TOO beat Khyber and implying he didn't is punishable by being forced to walk the Plank.
5128. It is wrong to make the plank sentient Ketler.
5129. Or to give her a female personality so John won't be lonely.
5130. The fact that Andrea bound the personality of a late crew member to it doesn't make it any better either.
5131. It is wrong to tell Marish that she's getting pudgy to get her to do catrobics.
5132. It is wrong to tell Michael purposely awful advice to court Lisa.
5133. No one is allowed to tell Michael that his Dragon Magazine Bhaalspawn template is worthless in Eberron.
5134. No one is allowed to play Baldur's Gate in front of him and point out how successful their characters are by comparison.
5135. Our drow crew member is forbidden to mock Drizzt.
5136. It was funny at the start but someone please let him out of the closet.
5137. It is wrong to make the joke "Drizzt Do'Urden won't come out of the closet"
5138. At least as many times as you've made it.
5139. Dooj, please stop moping about the fact Michael has fallen in love with Lisa....
5140. Yes, I know you like him THAT way but its really....
5141. Oh crap, did I just share that secret of yours with the entire crew?
5142. Ummm...pretend I never said that.
5143. As Captain I insist on a cut of all artifacts and magical items equal to my station...say....100% minus items that suck like the Eye of Vecna and 'talky' items like this sword "Stormbringer."
5144. Its impolite to speculate about my ever changing backstory.
5145. No, I am NOT Batman.
5146. I was just a billionaire Sharn Doctor's son that saw his family gunned down in a filthy ally before learning everything to fight crime.
5147. Andrea, you are forbidden from plotting against Terra's life.
5148. Yes, I know that there's not room for any other sexually alternate evil magicians but that's beside the point.
5149. The crew is forbidden from nominating new captains to replace me by the following methods...
5150. Lotto.
5151. Amateur porn video competition.
5152. Ritual Combat (wait that IS how I'm the Captain)
5153. For those who challenge me to ritual combat, we shall settle it by the manner of swords and pistols. You get the swords, I get the pistols.
5154. ...And that is why I am still captain.
5155. You cannot nominate the following people for Captain...
5156. Batman...
5157. The Master...
5158. Margeret Thatcher...
5159. Homer Simpson...
5160. Skeletor...
5161. Starscream...
5162. Cobra Commander...
5163. Colonel Klink....
5164. Keith Baker
5165. It is wrong to inform Stupid that Scholar is just one of his alternate personalities.
5166. From now on, all crew member Red Shirts will be recruited from the "Smith Clan" and be named John.
5167. I'm the captain Stop following Kithle.
5168. I'm the captain Stop following Smig, and Chalky.
5169. Speaking of which, I'm green and stuck.
5170. Don't turn my gawd damn ship into an episode of Friends.
5171. Don't come to me with your relationship questions...
5167. There is no such thing as Materia
5168. Jarlot's nickname is not Cloud, because this is not Final Fantasy
5169. The fact that the two girls who are interested in him are Tifa and Aeris/Aerith is only a slight coincedence
5170. Jarlot does not know how to wield a sword larger than himself
5171. He does not have a rival named Sephiroth who wants to destroy the world
5172: If a crewmember has not shown up for meals in two weeks or has not been seen in five days, the responsibility to have meals brought to those crewmembers rooms falls to whoever at the time is subordinate under the Cooky foor KP duty, if no one is assinged to KP duty, the responsibility falls upon the Cooky.
5173: NO MORE DUPLICATES, pholly/ie was onething, Igor/Igor is not going to cause a mess, but does anyone really want to think about the damage cloning Kithle or Satnak might cause. Heavens forbid someone clones Tifa.
You may not, under any circumstance when playing through Shadow of the Last War decide to drop adventuring to convert whitehearth into an inn. Even if it already apears to be convinently supplied.
Under no circumstances will you take a page from Rorsa's book on the dinning menu.
Nor will you convert the eldritch device into a band stage.
Nor will you have the artificer change the mechanic in the scry room to change with detect thought instead of being constant on the now ballroom.
NO you cna not glue spikes on your warforged companion and start to call him pokey, or any other derragtory refrence fo the lord of blades as a tourist attraction.
Under no circumstances will you steal the laudry basin so you don't have to worry about dirty clothes.
When approaching the gaurds in rose quarry, you will not hide and have the warforged, no matter how accurate it seems, run through screaming death to fleshies, and then lead the guards on a wild goosechase under the concept that warforged can run forever. Then expect the gaurds to come back fatigued after you burned the base down.
- 5177: A note to redshirts, under no circumstances are you to ambush an emerald claw patrol in terrain like Rose Quarry and then make camp immediatly adjacent to the site of your battle. Particularly when you know full well that a large and well supplied camp is only a quarter of a mile away. Failure to obey this rule will result in your remains and immortal soul being turned over to Andrea for "recreational" purposes. Thank you, please drive through.
5178) Neither Jingo nor Ninja Jeala are Yuffie.
5179) Volrath does not have Jenova, in his closet.
5180) That's a Shoggoth!
5181) Lisa is not Celes.
5182) Kelter, I don't care how well it would fit with your fan fiction.
5183) Terra's father is not a wolf shifter.
5184) Terra may not taunt Tifa by saying "My game's better than your game."
5185) Sa'vor does not have a katana taller than he is.
5186) Nor does he have flowing white hair.
5187) Kelter's playstation is confinscated.
5188: I am not Captain Kangaroo
5189: Volrath's bunny is not that Bunny Rabbit
5190: No one is to get me to say pingpong ball- *KAFWOOSSHHHH* -ever again. :mad:
5188) Micheal is not {insert character name here}
5189) When talking to Micheal people don't intentionally avoid saying his name.
5190) Even though Aerith is exceptionally cheerful and Micheal's sister, she is not Imoen.
5191) Volrath does not skin his aprentices and then do a little dance on their skins.
5192) Okay, maybe he does, but that does not make him Xvar.
5193) Kelter is not Jan.
5194) Jan is not sueing Chalky for copy right infringment.
9195) Terra is in no way Jaheira.
9196) Nalfien is not Edwin.
9197) Allen was not one of Bodhi's spawn.
9198) Kanatash was not once an elf.
9199) Kanatash is not trying to steal Micheal's soul.
9200) (in different handwriting) Yet.
9201) Kanatash never imprisoned Lisa as his "consort".
9202) Lisa was never a halfling.
9203) I am revoking everyone's Baldur's Gate rights.
9204) Kanatash was not trained by Kanatash, to summon his nightmares into the real world.
9205) Kanatash does not have a funny, twirly hat.
9206) Volrath does not have the Mirari
9207) (yet again in different handwriting) Yet.
9208) I was not adopted into Volrath's family.
9209) I did not save him during a ritual of passing.
9210) This ship was not originally name Weatherlight.
9211) Volrath did not travel to another planet, and create a religion suspiciopussly like the Silver Flame.
9212) I don't care if he is the son of a god and a mortal.
9213) Volrath will not rise on the third day.
9214)John will not be reincarnated as a fat guy who starts a religion on the same planet.
9215) Neither will :coolcthul
9216) Volrath's prochecy does not sound suspiciously like the timeline in "At the Mountains of Madness".
9217) Aerith will not meet a grisly end in a cut scene at Sa'vor's hand
9218) Crye was not destroyed by a meteor.
9219) Nor was it destroyed by Odin's spear.
9220) I thought I already took your guys' playstation away.
9221) There are no hidden cameras
9222) Norbaz's chili is not made from people.
9223) it is the hide skill not "the art of not being seen".
9224) Marish is not Sonia Belmont
9225) She just has a "thing" for whips.
9226. You are not allowed to use 257 more things skippy is not allowed to do in the brelish army as a field guide.
9227. or any other source of inspiration.
9228. Your paying him how much in consulting fees?
9229. Screw this get that guy on board. The brelish will owe us one.
5229. A five does not look like a nine.
5230. Michael is not Sephiroth.
5231. He wishes.
5232. It is wrong to attempt to steal Aerith's White Dragonshard.
5233. It will not summon Holy.
5234. Ninja Jaela is not to be called Yuffie.
5235. Even if she bears a remarkable resemblance.
5236. Dragonshards should not be called "Materia"
5237. House Cannith will not be called Shin-ra.
5238. House Cannith is not draining all the life energy of Eberron for its own use....
5239. ...save in the general way most supercorporations do.
5240. Ketler should not be called "Cid"
5241. Kithle is not Vincent Valentine.
5242. Aerith is not....oh hell, even I'm not going to pretend otherwise.
5243. Ditto with Tifa.
5244. We will not be out of "Phoenix Downs" if Aerith ever dies....
5245. Doog is not Barlett....
5246. Mostly because he'd never let Ketler make him a robot arm.
5247. We do not have cellphones, motorbikes, and power plants...despite how cool they are.
5248. The planet does not want to kill us all.
5249. Err....despite what Terra says.
5250. Despite the fact that yes, Khyber is PART of the planet and trying to kill us all.
5251. Jenova is not Erandis D'Vol.
5252. Even if Terra an Andrea do try to merge her with a fungus to cover the planet....
5253. Dinosaurs are not chocobos.
5254. You cannot inbreed dinosaurs to get green, blue, and black dinosaurs that can cross mountains, rivers, and both, repsectivly.
5255. And you CERTINALY can't breed those to get the notorious Gold Dinosaur, which will get you the ultimate Eberron Dragonshard.
5256. You may not carry six fullblades.
5257. Even if you have spikey hair.
5258. And are epic.
5259. Bahamut is not a legitimite 9th level summon.
5260. Argonessen is not the land of the ancients.
5261. Crater isn't there, dammit!
5262. Merrix d'Cannith does not wear a white trechcoat or have a homonculos named DarkNation.
5263. Nor was he actualy in the Mourning, surviving by means of PLOT DEVICE.
5264. His name is not Rufus Shinra, dammit!
5265. The only reason for this is that his flunkies are not as cool as the Turks.
5266. Cyre is not Midgar.
5267. Even if it was the base of a now-evil corporation and has been blasted by a magical apocalypse.
5268. DAMMIT, KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TAKES FIVE TURNS TO SUMMON.
5269. Ok, fine. the DM summons Meteor and you all die. :D
5270: We are not characters in some "game" called Dungeons and Dragons.
5271: It is wrong to tell the warforged that wounds won't bleed out because that's not how HP work.
5272: It is wrong to tell the warforged that limbs won't come off because there aren't any rules for severing limbs.
5273: It is wrong to tell the warforged that he has a specific amounnt of wealth that he should absolutely have because he is of a certain level.
5274: Because then he might asked to be paid.
5275: It is wrong to tell the warforged that as the captain of this ship I am also the DM, and thus killing me will stop all the madness this ship has to go through.
5276: I doubt destroying the whole world could stop it now.
5277: We are now instituting the practice of mental keelhauling. There will be a practical demonstration on Doog this evening in the mess hall.
5278: I am not Cloud. Don't you remember the flashback?! Cloud wouldn't let me come along!
5279: Just because I now have a personal servant: [SIZE=3]I am not Batman.[/SIZE]
5280 (chalked in below): I will visit you soon with the Helm of Ninja/Pirate Conversion.—signed, The Folly
5281: Bruce d'canith may be batman...
5282: (Write underneath) It's Man-bat!
5281: There is not a version of me aboard this ship who is male, thinks he's the greatest hero who ever lives, worships Dol Dorn, drinks, and tries to pretend he isn't chaotic evil.
5281 (the real one): The crew is forbidden from wrightin in fake rules for fun. (penciled in below): Ah, captain, none of us did that.
5282: Any arguments over whether FFVI or FFVII is a better game that break out into fights shall result in a mental keelhauling.
5283: Or whether Kefka or Sephiroth was a better BBEG.
5284: Ketler is not Cid
5285: ANY of them
5286: Terra is not Half-Esper
5287: Regardless of what she says
- 5288: No, Merrix D'Cannith does not look like santa claus, nor is the co-creator the lord of blades.
- 5289: For that matter, the lord of blades never looked like einstien.
- 5290: You may not attach a cannon on to the warforge's arm to call him megaman.
- 5291: Nor are rockman, cutman, blues, gutsman, tomahawkman, bombman, airman, or any other robot master ever made in the megaman series an acceptable name.
- 5292: Making a soulknife kalashtar and calling him a jedi will have you sent to Satnak's room.
- 5293: When she is in a bad mood.
5294: Crow's full name is not Crow T. Robot
5295: Silver is not a polymorphed Gypsy
5296: There is no Tom Servo aboard
5297: Niether Ketler or Allen are Joel Robinson
5298: Or Dr. Clayton Forester
5299: Igor is not TV's Frank
5300: Or Torgo
5301: Kanatash is not Brain Guy
5302: Even if he can make your head explode with a thought
5303: Slip is not Magic Voice
5304: There is no one named Slip aboard!
5305: I am not planning to force you to watch B-movies in an effort to drive you insane
5306: Actually, that's not a bad idea. Lets see...
1: Force crew to watch bad movies 2: ??? 3: World Domination
- The crew are forbiden from dealing in any way with Skippy, on penalty of liquid keelhaling.
- +1 The crew are not to alter the climate or sea levels for comercal gain. Dorn & Arda do you not get druids?
5307. Cyre is not Hollow Bastion.
5308. Vol is not Maleficent.
5309. Even if she is an evil dragony spellcaster of doom with designs on world domination who uses the power of darkness and corrupts people into doing her bidding.
5310. By the same token, Kaius is CERTINALY not Riku.
5311. Your Avian Wizard, Shifter Fighter, and strange unholy WarmageSoulknifeFighterBardClericPaladin are not going to go around locking up the various manifest zones, or the planes. Or unlocking them.
5312. Quori are not heartless.
5313. Shadow creatures are not heartless either.
5314. Ansem is not a daelkyr.
5315. Kaius is not Ansem either.
5316. Merrix MIGHT be Ansem, or That guy who isn't ansem, but some other guy all along, we promise.. But it's in your best intrests if he isn't.
5317. Your airship is not made of "gummi".
5318. The two gnomes who help maintain your airship are not named "Chip n Dale"
5319. THIS SHIP DOES NOT RUN ON HAPPY FACES. :(
xxxx) I am not Captain Jack Sparrow.
xxxx) Or Sir Lancelot.
xxxx) The crew is making me specify this.
5320: Caralot is not allowed to tell the story featuring Jaela and something called a “turkey baster”.
5321: Not even if the crew pays and the captian gets a cut.
5322: Because Lisa will kill us, paladin’s code be d*mn*d.
5323: Caralot is not allowed to give out “enhancements” to crew members who are not redshirts.
5324: Because Michael did not like Doog better with those kinds of enchancements.
5325: Crew members are forbidden from participating in “breeding experiments” conducted by Caralot.
5326: Because I mentioned them in front of Michael, and he went all still and whimpered.
5327: Caralot is prohibited from trying to collect “samples” from Kithle.
5328: I don’t care if he is “a prime specimen”.
5329: What is it with Caralots and Kithle?
5330: Crew are prohibited from making fun of Caralot’s name in front of Roosevelt.
5331: Unless you enjoy the feeling of stumbling around on an uneven deck.
5332: Caralot is not allowed to encourage Klaz “because it is the perfect opportunity to watch a breeding experiment in the wild”.
5333: It is wrong to tell the warforged that Caralot wants to collect a “sample” from him.
5334: She was able to do WHAT?
5335: Just because Caralot can now enhance me with ninja powers does not mean that I will become Batman.
5336: Saberiel (the Half-Nymph Succubus who supposedly tempted Michael to evil) is excused from following #5325.
5337: Aeirith is also excused.
5338: No, you may not ask why.
5339: Caralot is not allowed to collect "samples" from any member of the beholder family.
5340: Because I keep having nightmares.
5341: Caralot is not allowed to collect "samples" from the demon chochobos.
5342: Caralot is not allowed to collect "samples" from………GAAAAARRGH!
5342 (revised): Caralot is not allowed to tell anyone ANYTHING about what she does with Cool Cthulu.
5343: Caralot is not allowed to tell anymore stories about Jaela.
5344. Satnak is hearby forbidden to use attacks from gundam G.
5345. Or any other gundam series.
5346. Nor is she allowed to use moves from DB/Z/GT, (gah i'm not nerdy enough to do a better list plz add on) or Rouroni Kenshin.
5347. So help me I don't care if it costs me the entire gorram crew and the ship and a good chunk of the multiverse, i will have you keelhauled if you even think *thundershock*.
5348: The crew is not allowed to make up new continents.
5349: Entities from the existance beyond non-existance are not allowed to make up new continents.
5350: Authors of the posts on this strip are not allowed to make up new continents.
5341: As a creation of the founder of this strip I am intitled to make up rules that affect those who post on it.
5342: All desires to visit a desert full of ancient ruins shall be posted to Xen'drick.
5343: All desires to get your head chopped off by a guy on a horse shall be posted to Valenar.
5344: Karrnath has way more than enough mummies to meet any need.
5345: We get enough plant-based mystical powers from Terra's brews.
5346: Pirates do not do spice markets. Especially if it involves thieves.
5347: Our next stop is a new, undiscovered desert continent.
5358. No yuyu-hakusho moves for satnak.
5359. We will never again speak of what Satnak did to super jarlot, and someone get the girl a migraine pill.
5360: Satnak is not allowed to destroy the new continent.
5361: Satnak will not be making deities on request.
5362. Squirrels are not fire proof.
5638. Satnak, no Knights of the Zodiac moves, now your just trying to annoy me with obscure stuff.
5639: Marish is hereby forbidden to be alone with Not-Walter
5640: Make that any female crewmembers
5641: Screw it, ANY crewmembers
5642: Except Terra, of course
5643: Because we all know she doesn't swing that way
5644: Re:#5639-41, Unless someone wants footage
5645: And I get a cut
5646: And you must never, EVER tell me what happened in there
5647: Do not taunt Happy Fun Satnak
5648: Because a happy Satnak is usually a bad thing
5649: For you
5650: An unhappy Satnak is likely to be just as bad
5651: Which is what she will be if you taunt her
5652: She does not do 'fun' well either
5653: Don't forget what she did when the Redshirts tried to get her to 'lighten up'
5654: Yes, Pholly, you still have to clean it up
Start of new rules for the ship (Forgotten Freedom 2)....
1. Kanatash is forbidden from killing or driving crazy...er....more than 10% of the crew a month.
2. We seriously are taking a hit on our insurance.
3. Satnak is forbidden from killing off plot devices.
4. Except Keanu Jarlot. No one likes him.
5. No more using crew in chili....
6. Unless its ReD shirts.
7. If Ishmael EVER even LOOKS at Sakura EVEN ACCIDENTALLY then he shall be be unrestricted from all previous rules.
8. I shall stop pretending I'm the ultimate of all badasses...which means...
9. I shall not be allowed to say "Call me Snake."
10. Especially not "Solid Snake"
11. I am not Rambo...
12. I can kick his ass.
13. Tifa is forbidden from attacking me until I love her.
14. YES, I REALLY MEAN THAT.
15. Sakura cannot talk to ANY BOYS...EVAR.
16. OR TERRA.
17. Or Lisa for that matter.
18. Any crew who isn't ALL dead, please fill out a census form.
19: All rules from the FF mark 1 still apply
20: Satnak isn't allowed to use moves from Granida
????: The Daughters of Sora Kell are not the White Witch (or whatever her name is).
????: Despite the fact that they have hoards of ogres and minotaurs at their disposals.
????: They are not opposed by a kingly lammasu named Aslan.
24: Regardless of what she says, the rule stating that Satnak can't destory plot devices still stands.
5655. Any pilot caught chanting "I am a leaf on the wind" during difficult flight maneuvers will be pistol whipped.
5656. During the maneuver.
5657. The correct verbal component for a Fireball spell is not "KAMEHAMEHAAAAAA!!!!!". Nor is it "Ha Do Ken!"
5658. Violators will be pistol whipped.
5659. Do not refer to the Warforged as "Al".
5660. Or "Alphonse".
5661. Or anything from Adult Swim. Or be pistol whipped.
5662. You may not sell your "returning" weapons only to "yoink" them back into your hand as you run out of the store.
5663. There is no sentient meatball, milkshake, or order of french fries aboard this ship. So stop asking.
5664: The Forgotten Freedom is not the Albatross
5665: I or II
5666: or the Little Jack
5667: OR THE DELPHINUS!
5668: I am not Vyse
5669: Aerith is not Fina
5670: When she was still Tifa, Beryl was not Aika
5671: Satnak is not the female version of Drachma
5672: Yes, I know she's grumpy, hits us a lot, and has a synthetic arm but that's beside the point
5673: Devon is not Gilder
5674: Neither is Michael
5675: King Kaius is not Galcian
5676: Dragonshards are not Moon Stones
5677: Kaarnath is not Valua
5678: Xen'drick is not Ixa'taka
5679: Valenar is not Nasr
5680: Riedra is not Yafutoma
5681: Ketler's Mi-go cannon thing is not the Moonstone Cannon
5682: I know it's eerily similar and that the Entity from Beyond Non-existance was thinking of it when he told Ketler to make it, but...
5683: OK, OK ALREADY! IT'S THE FREAKING MOONSTONE CANNON!
- ) Satnak is not a santak
5686. Illis is a respected and feared berserker, calling him willy will earn you a quick death.
5687. Shut up Willy, no one hurts these losers but me, go ahead call him willy I'll make sure he doesn't hurt you.
5688. Both of you stop messing with the list, this isntant.!!!
5689. Paedophilia is never funny.
5690. And I mean it this time!
5692: Liam d'Ghallanda is not a redshirt. He is a paying passenger and is to be treated with the utmost respect.
5693: Why? Because the longer Liam stays on the boat and alive, the more money he pays me, thus, the better chance you have of getting a paycheck.
5689) When Aerith returns to the heavens she will not forget about us.
5690) She isn't just standing around waiting for us to die, so she can harvest ourt souls.
5691) Kanatash never tried to fuse Aerith with a half-elf.
5692) He also never tried to make her his goddess of "love"
5693) Sa'vor is not holding Aerith's little sister prisoner.
5694) We did not find Kanatash and Sa'vor in a secret dungeon.
5695) Just because I have a huge sword, a attitude problem, and seem like I never die, does not mean that heaven won't take me.
5696) Volrath will not use the "dragon orb" when he destroys the world.
5697) In the event of Volrath destroying the world, Aerith will revive it and kick his sorry butt.
5698) We are not being reincarnated an infinate number of times, through out history
5699) We were never commanded by Aerith's dominatrix sister
5700) Although...
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