Girl Talk

Katherine's head was spinning. The highs of the battle, the relief that everyone made it out from the catacombs, the exhaustion of her emotions had left her unprepared for the odd and strangely exciting conversation that she had just had with Ezekiel and Neecy. French method? What in heaven? Her mind glommed onto another piece of the conversation. She and Ezekiel to be secretly married. Soon. Tired as she was, she skipped a step before entering her room. It was time for bed.

But as she opened the door, she paused. She had questions to be answered. Her eyebrows lowered in an uncharacteristic frown. And if she filled her mind with the forbidden and titillating, she might be able to keep the face of Lord Dashwood from her dreams tonight. Closing her door, she strode over to Flora's room and knocked on the door.

Flora’s day had been . . . eventful seemed not quite the correct word, lacking somehow. Thoughts of that dream or whatever she had experienced were plaguing her and she didn’t really want to sleep for fear of returning to that place. In her mind it wasn’t a dream at all, no, the woman had been there, wherever there was didn’t matter, she just knew she didn’t want to go back.

The knock on the door interrupted her thoughts and perhaps that was a good thing. Flora expected it to be Bertie; it would be about the time when he would show up. Actually he might be a tad overdue. She made her way to the door and opened it. Standing on the other side was Katherine. Oh yes, the talk. Was the other woman here for that, perhaps?

”Hello”, she responded, still trying to rid her mind of what she was thinking about only moments before. “Would you like to come in?”

"Um, Flora," Katherine began, and then paused. "Would you like to come to my room once you are dressed for bed and comfortable? I have questions, many, many questions and I need your help." The words were rushed, as if it took all her courage to ask, and the following smile was weak but genuine. "I'm going to go find Josephine. She might be able to help me too. If you don't mind, give me a few moments to change." The redhead nodded absently, as if her mind were elsewhere. "I'd like to be comfortable for this." The green eyes focused abruptly. "See you in a bit?"

Flora simply listened to Katherine’s request and then nodded with a gentle smile.

”Of course. I will be there in, perhaps, ten minutes or so.” That should give her time to get changed and Katherine time to do what she needed to as well.

Katherine left and Flora quietly closed the door behind her and proceeded to get changed into more comfortable clothing. She had pretty much figured what this might be about and while the subject did not bother her to discuss, she would still like to be comfortable when she did so.

Josephine sighed as she entered her garret room and closed the door. It was a solid presence at her back as she leaned against it and it held her up as she closed her eyes, weary. The sounds and sights and smells from their trip to the catacombs clamored in her head and she opened her eyes to dispel them. It didn’t take much to recall the imp’s spell or feel again the warm clamminess of the tentacles slithering over her. Her skin crawled.

God.

Unable to bear wearing them one more blessed minute, Josephine stripped her clothing off and left it in a pile on the floor. She’d just pulled a clean change of linen on when a knock sounded at her door.

“One moment,” she called, puzzled as to who her visitor might be. Scarpelli’s servants pretty much had left her alone, neither interfering with her activities nor inviting her to join theirs. She grabbed her robe—a man’s cast off that she’d picked up from a Jewish secondhand dealer years ago—and shrugged it on. Seeing herself decently covered to wrists and ankles, Josephine set her chin high and addressed her door. “Enter.”

Katherine stood there, a bit more composed than when she had spoken to Flora. Her eyes crinkled as she smiled, having warmed to the idea. "Hello, Josephine. Would you be interested in coming to my room and having a bit of a small chat? I am having Flora in for some conversation and a general winding down of a rather exciting day." She tilted her head. "I need to change into my bed things and a robe. Would you join us in a few moments? I'm going to have the maid make us some tea." Tired, she finally let herself lean against the doorframe as she waited for Josephine to answer. In the back of her mind, the disembodied head of Lord Dashwood continued screaming, echoing through her thoughts. Yes, she would need company tonight, no question.

Josephine took in the shadows around her friend’s green eyes, line of her shoulders on the doorjamb, and her own weariness retreated in the face of her friend’s distress.

“Of course,” Josephine shoved her bare feet into a pair of clean wool socks and pulled her boots on over them. She slipped an arm around Katherine’s waist and hugged her as she gently pulled her into the hall. “Here, lean on me.”

Josephine closed her door with her free hand and locked it, pocketing the key.

“I hope the tea arrives soon. You could use a little revivifying.”

Katherine nodded gratefully. "I thank you," she said softly, taking the help. She was more tired than she would have been willing to admit. She would have carried Neecy through the fires of Hell to bring him to safety, but the hobbit and the run up the stairs with him on her shoulder after the battle had been taxing.

Her change into comfortable clothing was quick with the maid's help and ordering tea was much simpler with Josephine there to translate. Dressing gown on, underthings changed, she flopped ungracefully onto the bed and patted the mattress. "Come sit and let's wait for Flora. She should be here shortly."

Flora got changed into more comfortable clothing in a matter of minutes. She felt as if she were slower than usual tonight but it was probably just tiredness from the events of earlier. Though she tried to change quickly as not to be derailed by Bertie. Frankly she was not up for him and his ways tonight. Somehow, perhaps he was also tired or maybe he was …occupied with other things. Maybe perhaps it was just pure luck but no Bertie came to detain her.

The woman left her room and headed towards Katherine’s knocking on the door and waitubg to be let in.

Katherine rose from the bed at the knock and opened the door. "Come in, come in," she exclaimed brightly. "Come and join us on the bed." She gestured as she closed the door and then joined the other two. Looking from one face to the other, she bit her lip and then after a thousand different segues running through her mind, she simply asked, "What in heaven's name is the French Method and how will it be pleasing to Ezekiel?" She was too tired to be circumspect and besides, they had battled the forces of Hell together. She wiggled against her pillows to get more comfortable and waited for the answer.

I'd hoped she'd have forgotten, Josephine thought and immediately felt ashamed for it. Katherine was a dear friend and a staunch ally, all the more precious for having become so in so a short time and Josephine would stint at nothing to help her satisfy her curiosity and put any fears at rest. However, Katherine's forthright query flummoxed her. Josephine knew of that which Katherine sought, but had no direct experience of it. So how to answer? Josephine flicked a glance at Flora, hoping to find in the other woman's expression or posture a clue as to how to approach it.

Flora nodded and then nodded a hello to Josephine; taking a seat on the bed as requested. It was perhaps a good thing that the tea hadn’t arrived and Flora wasn’t drinking; if she had been certainly tea would have ended up all over the bed or perhaps Flora would have choked a bit. It wasn’t the subject matter, she just hadn’t expected Katherine's question to be that forward.

Flora was well aware of what the French method was, well as far as she suspected that was what was being discussed. The woman glanced at Josephine and then looked at Katherine. Flora’s look said it all, the direct approach was perhaps best in this situation.

“There are two meanings to this. One is the act of having intercourse with a man and having him ….leave you…before he does what he needs to, fulfill his needs. The second is using your mouth to satisfy him. I have the feeling you might be being meaning the second way.” She paused and took a breath. “They can both be used to satisfy a man but prevent pregnancy but I personally feel the second way is better at preventing pregnancy than the first.”

The cat green eyes widened and although Katherine tried to keep a serious face, she finally started giggling. "My mouth? To satisfy him? I'm quite good at kissing him. I am dying to kiss him all over." Abruptly, she sobered. "But you are talking about kissing him. . .um, other places?" She stared at Flora as the beautiful Eldren nodded. "Ah." Nodding, she felt her face begin to catch fire. "So men like this?"

Flora couldn’t help but smile at Katherine’s giggle. “Yes. Basically it is kissing him all over but there is more to it.” Flora saw Katherine sober and she did as well. “Yes other places.” She didn’t want to embarrass the other woman but there was no other way really to discuss this subject than out in the open. “Men like it very much.”

"So, one kisses his manhood?" Katherine had to look away to say it and then glanced back at both women. "Ezekiel would like that?" She had picked up the coverlet and had begun to twist it in her hands without being aware. "Is that all there is to pleasing a man?" She bit her lower lip. "I want him to enjoy our night without the danger of my getting pregnant, but I do not know what to do. You must tell me." She twisted the coverlet more. "I am horribly curious. It is improper, but he fills me with a fire that I've never felt."

How to explain this? Flora glanced at Katherine who was now playing with the coverlet. “It’s not just kissing it. There is a way to do this to have him be satisfied.” She was trying to not overly shock the girl, but how else could you explain how to do this? “It you really want to know I’ll tell you but be prepared. It tends to shock most woman upon first hearing about it.”

She nodded to what Katherine said next. “I do not find those feelings improper. It is actually nice that you feel such passion towards him.” What might be improper would be discussing it among mixed company or something but feeling it certainly was not, Flora thought.

Katherine took a long breath, but leaned forward. "Tell me what one must do and how to do it well." She listened as the other Eldren began to speak in choice detail, her initial hesitation and trepidation giving way to an almost scientific interest. Finally, the deed described in detail, Katherine clapped her hands, giving the tortured coverlet a break. "I shall never look at Bertie the same," she exclaimed before dissolving in laughter. "So, what should I wear to entice Ezekiel and what danger is there in shared baths?" She glanced at Josephine to gauge her expression; the other woman had been silent during the instructions with the exception of going to let the maid in to deliver the tea.

Josephine listened to the conversation, silently filling in the gaps in her experience. It was as she suspected. Fabienne had been as forthright as she could have been answering Josephine’s questions but the courtesan’s time had been limited and Josephine’s cover precluded being closeted with the woman. At the time, Josephine had thought it academically interesting and later had glimpsed the carnal possibilities before David left her. Already bruised over Ezekiel, her feelings about David stabbed again and she was saved from remembering more when the maid arrived with the tea tray. Josephine quickly took it from her and nodded her thanks, dismissing the maid. Pouring for the three of them helped Josephine gather herself and shut her memories away. David was gone, she was a little older and wiser, and damned if she’d let that affair get the best of her. She handed Katherine and Flora their cups and settled on the coverlet with her own, blowing on her beverage to cool it.

The first uncomfortable question answered, Flora relaxed. She had been taught well by Bertie; if she had known these things before hand, she did not know and right now it did not matter. Upon what Katherine said, Flora breathed a laugh. And then more questions. She sighed and answered,” We will need to go though your wardrobe. I believe you must have something appropriate for the occasion.” She then thought for a moment. “There are some tales of woman getting pregnant from sharing baths.” She was not certain if this was true or if it was the deeds done in those baths. “I have not heard of any other dangers.”

“Thank you,” she said to Josephine as the woman handed her tea. Flora sipped it and waited to see if any other questions were directed at her.

"As to what to wear," Josephine spoke into her tea,” you could eschew clothing altogether."

Holding the warm cup in both hands, Katherine couldn't help but smile wryly. She had learned more in this evening than she had learned in a lifetime. Or so she'd argue. What she was hearing now was much more interesting than much of what she had learned in her formal education. "Isn't there something of seduction in wearing something that the man must remove?" She took a sip of tea. "I'm quite innocent in this, but nakedness is the ending, correct?"

A sudden firing of nerves ran from her belly to the tips of her extremities as the thought of Ezekiel naked before her went through her mind. Her breath caught; his legs and body pressed against hers during their fencing match, the feel of his chest through his vest and shirt, his lips on hers. . . all the physical sensations came together in the vision of his body and hers together without the barriers of cloth between them. She put the tea into her lap and waited for the heat of her body subside. There was no blush to her now and she knew that her eyes had kindled. The conversation was doing as she hoped. If Dashwood screamed, she no longer heard the echoes in her head.

Flora silently agreed that while you could just wear nothing, she instead responded to Katherine’s question with “Yes, there is. I personally think that men like a woman to wear something nice and pleasing to them so they can remove it. Especially, your first night together. If you take the time to put yourself together for a man, especially for just the two of you, it shows that you are performing the extra effort just for him. Men seem to like such things and the little bit of clothing leaves their imagination going until they have a chance to remove it.”

"It's true," Josephine affirmed. "A little bit of mystery goes a long way, and it hold as true for a woman about a man, as a man about a woman. I ...It's not something I've been able to explore completely myself, but I have trod the territory. I'm sure I needn't describe how it makes you feel when you're swept up in it." She set her cup aside and leaned forward to give Katherine's knee a companionable squeeze. "I'm very glad that you've found Ezekiel, Katherine, and he you, and I know you will make each other very happy. Happier than you are now."

More than that, Josephine didn't dare say. It would be too easy to turn maudlin or slide into self-pity. Now wasn't the time or place for either. Josephine withdrew behind her cup again and said to Flora, "You and Bertie seem destined for matrimony, but while I am certain I know how Bertie would view the arrangement, what of you, Flora? Are you at peace with the decision? I thought it was all rather sudden myself."

She sipped her tea as Josephine spoke to Katherine and nodded in agreement, it was all true, in her experience. Then the question was turned on her, she sipped her tea again to come up with her answer. She didn’t love Bertie but she did have feelings for him, strong feelings perhaps. She didn’t think those were love; it certainly was different with Katherine and Ezekiel, she could tell when they looked at each other. Not to mention, while she believed Bertie did care about her she was almost certain, short of reading his mind, that he did not love her either. So, could one really be at peace with marrying someone they do not love? she thought.

”I owe Bertie a great deal. The man practically saved my life, if it was not for him, I do not know where I would be or how I would have survived.” She paused and then said, ‘I am fine with the decision. If it is what is meant to be it will be.” She knew that she was very much avoiding the actual answer. Flora never said she was at peace with it, she basically had said she would be able to live with it.

Katherine smiled gently. "Bertie will treat you well, Flora. I'll make certain of it." She tilted her head, her smile turning wicked. "I still have the buggy whip."

"Buggy whip?" Josephine looked up from her tea at that last comment, curiosity making her forget her past disappointments. "Applied to Bertie in the same sentence, too. Dare I ask if an amusing story is attached?"

Katherine shrugged gracefully. "I threatened to chase Bertie with the whip when I found out that he had moved us here instead of the farmhouse. But were he to do something bad to Flora, I would beat him black and blue." She nodded firmly to punctuate the statement before taking a long drink of the now cooler tea. The wave of heat had left her although the vision of Ezekiel still filled her mind. She licked her lips, a smile playing around her lips as she imagined leaning against him in the tub. There was so much to learn, so much to experience. Her eyes brightened. "Flora, can two people fit easily in a tub?"

It hadn't occurred to her to think about the logistics of it yet. She looked from one woman to the other and waited for the definitive answer. She would buy a new tub if necessary.

Flora smiled at what Katherine said. It was nice that the other woman was willing to look out for her. "I believe that that won't be necessary but thank you for saying that." As to the tub question a playful smile played on Flora's lips. "Yes. Though, it’s easier to fit in some tubs than others." The redheaded Eldren nodded. "So, what other things do men like?" She bit her lip again, suddenly chagrined, but forged ahead. "What are some of the things that Bertie likes for you to do, Flora? Are there techniques to kissing? Ways to touch a man that will please him? Do they mind if you. . .ah. . .if you enjoy it as much as they do?"

Having nothing to add to the conversation that was substantiated by anything other than her own imagination, Josephine remained silent and sipped her tea. It was hard to sit and listen to Katherine's questions--both for the subject matter and the matter's focus--but to leave now would only point out her discomfort and its cause, both things which Katherine could neither control nor assume blame. Some things exist merely to be endured, Jo, came her father's voice from memory. You'll have to bear any number of hurtful or distasteful things to get to the truth. And just what is the truth here, Father? Other than the fact I've fallen in love with a man I cannot touch? That the woman he loves is a dear friend and sister to me, who I would not hurt for the world?

But her father said nothing and Josephine could do nothing but sip her tea and keep what she felt from her face.

Flora felt a little bombarded by all the questions but was happy to answer just the same, answering the questions in order. She went though other things that men liked, in as much detail as Katherine asked for. When it came to what Bertie liked Flora to do, Flora calmly sipped her tea and responded, "Everything I mentioned and more. But I am unsure if I should divulge everything here. Some things about your cousin perhaps it's best you don't know."

She would say no more on that matter. She did explain kissing techniques, ways to touch a man and at the question about enjoying it as much as a man, a smile crossed Flora's lips. "In my experience it greatly pleasures a man to know that he has been able to pleasure a woman."

She felt as if she was nodding until her head popped off. As Flora finished, Katherine grinned. She had finished her tea and put it on the side table, leaving her hands free to take Flora's. "Thank you! I know that I've put you on the spot and rudely so. This is something that a girl should seek from her mother, but. . ." She pushed a wisp of hair from her face. "She isn't here," she continued softly.

Abruptly, Katherine realized that she missed the woman that she had never known, a beautiful serene face in the single photograph that had been taken of her. Her father had paintings of her mother, but they had rarely spoken of her. She patted Flora's hands and then released them. "I suppose the rest must be a mystery that Ezekiel and I discover together." She took a long breath. "How are you doing, Flora? It was not pleasant for you down in the catacombs. I should have been more aware that you might not want to be quizzed after such an afternoon. So thank you."

Flora gave Katherine a gently, friendly smile. "It is quite all right." Her face was pleasant, not letting anything show beyond that. The mention of Katherine's mother brought to mind Flora's own thoughts or more questions. She wondered what her own mother was like and her family. And a slight twinge of regret crossed her mind at the idea that if the plan went though and she was claimed as an heir to the Dashwood fortune, she might not find her own real family. "You and Ezekiel need to find out things on your own. That is the best way."

She did not want to discuss the catacombs and avoided more discussion of the place by saying, “I am fine. And it is perfectly fine that you asked tonight; tonight was just as fine as any other night." Perhaps not true, but Flora would never let anyone know that.

Blinking, certain that something was off with Flora, but not able to put her finger on it, Katherine responded with a smile of her own. She glanced at Josephine, taking a moment to study her face through the sidelong look. She also was a bit off. Perhaps she had made them too solemn, speaking of her mother. Her mouth opened, but she had no words, so she closed her lips again. Finally, in the silence, she blurted out, "Do men have clothing that they wear to seduce you? Will Ezekiel wear something to seduce me like you will help me pick out?"

"Not generally, no." Josephine set her cup aside, finally unable to hide behind it any longer as the double standard stung. "For some reason, it's the woman's lot to do all that sort of work for them. Torturous fashions, ridiculous shoes, affected helplessness reinforced by corsets. I daresay men have no inkling how hard it is to be a respectably dressed woman when they have never had their limbs fettered or their feet crippled or their breath constricted out of them. Or froze for the sake of titillation when something warm would have been more sensible."

She couldn't help but draw herself up, her face growing still though her eyes betrayed worried hurt. "I don't believe that is something I will have to fear from Ezekiel, Josephine. I will say that I've gotten more disapproval for my behavior and dress from women than from the men in my life."

Flora sipped her tea, saying nothing to the sudden turn in the conversation. Both sides were both correct and yet incorrect in certain assumptions, at least in her opinion.

"Oh, no, Katherine," Josephine said quickly, realizing too late how her words had been received. "That is what makes Ezekiel such a treasure. You can be sure that he would never seek to crush the spirit of the woman he loves by stupid notions of propriety. His Chartist philosophy is so much more sensible and equitable toward that end than anything I've ever encountered. Save the Americans, and yet even they have their own ideas on proper womanhood." It was on the tip of her tongue to say that the standards women labored under increased their severity in direct proportion to the monetary wealth involved, but managed to suppress it.

Katherine drew a breath, calming instantly. "I'm sorry, Josephine. I shouldn't have taken umbrage. I've been fortunate to live under my father and Neecy; they have indulged me far more than any woman could hope for. And Ezekiel is the soul of kindness to love me despite my independence and bless him, he even encourages it. Most women will never have my freedoms. I may fuss that I labor under shackles, but I am one of the most free women that I know." She reached over to take Josephine's hand. "With the exception of you, I'd say. You are a woman free of all shackles by choice, independent of the views of men or women. I admire that."

Josephine gave her friend's hand a reassuring squeeze and said, "I was rude and umbrage was the reasonable response. I am not offended and I am sorry I've offered offense. As for the rest of it, while I may be free of the shackles society may seek to impose on me, it is at the expense of any expectation of succor and safety those shackles might otherwise grant me. It is not a trade-off lightly undertaken and I'm afraid much of what you admire in me has little to do with spirit or freedom, but rather with dire necessity."

"Wonderful!" Katherine answered with feeling. "I could not bear to sleep if we ended the night on a quarrel." She freed her hand to stifle a yawn. "I believe that if you both are as tired as I, I need to let you retire to your own rooms. Thank you for your advice and friendship." She rolled to her knees with catlike reflexes and proceeded to hug them both.

"Nor could I," Josephine said and returned the hug, grateful she hadn't ruined the mood or the evening. "I would very much like to do this again. I haven't had the oppportunity to do this since ... well, ever. I've had teachers and colleagues through the years, but none have ever been women friends. I fear I am apallingly backward in that regard. I do hope we can do this again, and soon."

Flora had said nothing regarding freedom or the lack of it imposed on woman. Mostly due to the fact that she could not speak of such things, she was kept woman and as such belonged to Bertie and when she became his wife it would be the same. Fortunately Bertie, for all his flaws, treated her well. There were far worse fates that could have been bestowed on her. She returned the hug that Katherine had given her. "I would also like to do this again sometime." She had nothing to speak of for teachers , colleagues, friends, knowing nothing of her past. She put her now empty tea cup down and stood up. "It has been an interesting evening. Thank both of you." With a nod Flora went on her way back to her room.

"I should go, Katherine," Josephine said, sliding from the bed and standing. "It's late and you need your rest." She leaned over the coverlet to pick up the tea cups and saucers.

Katherine reached to help her. "We can stack them for the maid." She thought for a moment and then reached for Josephine's arm. "Thank you for your friendship with Ezekiel and I. I know that it is hard for you sometimes." She sought Josephine's eyes and smiled gently. "I adore you and I am grateful for your friendship."

"And I'm grateful for yours," Josephine said. "For you and Ezekiel both. I don't ...," she paused, wondering how much to reveal and how much to keep secret. Katherine was untested--much as she herself was--and Josephine did not think it prudent to burden the Eldren woman with confidences that would only make her worry. So she chose discretion over honesty and simply hugged her friend good night. "Thank you for finding me and pulling me down from the garrett. I had a wonderful time."

Katherine waved goodnight and quietly shut the door behind Josephine as she left the room. Crawling into the bed after blowing out the candles, Katherine snuggled down under the covers, sighing as her feet and body found the pockets of warmth left by the other two women's bodies. She sighed softly, turning onto her side, and cuddled into the pillows. Closing her eyes, Lord Dashwood's face came to her again, his mouth contorted by his endless scream.

She opened her eyes again into the darkness and pulled a pillow down to hold it against her as she began to softly cry. Tears came; in relief, in fear, in sorrow, and in sympathy. They had all survived and the gate was closed. Ezekiel had survived and so had Neecy, Bertie, Flora, and Josephine. And yet. That face, contorted in pain and her agonized fear as she watched Ezekiel walked up to the gate. Had she lost him. . .

Crawling from the bed, she went to her knees on the cold floor and said a prayer. For the face that screamed from her memory, the man who it had once been, and for the protective hand of the Host to continue to watch over them all. There was worst to come. That she knew.

Gathering her wrapper once she had finished her prayer, she put it on and curled in a chair by the window and waited for the morning to come.

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