He Was Not A Robot

The pub in Lucifer's Landing probably isn't the cleanest spot on Angel and the food certainly ain't the fanciest but they don't water down the drinks and, more importantly, they always have an empty table. Perhaps that's why the crew, past and present, of the Summer's Gift have settled there this evening in order to pay tribute to a certain adventurer who is, most likely, dead and gone.

"Rick," Christian says as he raises his beer, "was brilliant... and, like the rest of us, a complete and utter idiot. A gloryhound who pursued what he desired with dogged determination. A lover of nature who never, to my knowledge, actively loved nature. So." He stands up, "Here's to Rick. One thing's for sure. He wasn't a robot."

Joshua raises his glass in return. "Here here!"

Nika sits back in her chair with her boot propped on the bottom of the seat next to hers -- coincidentally, Rina's seat. She lifts her beer in acknowledgement and smirks faintly at the 'complete and utter idiot.' "Ah well.... at least he and his blue-hand blondie went together, I suppose. It's what he wanted. Which always just wierded me out. But to Rick -- the man was //not// a robot."

Joshua pauses and then stands up. "I didn't know Rick as well as everyone else. But I did know that he was awesome. Awesomely awesome." He pauses for a minute in reflection, and then says, "If there is one thing that sums the man up, it was that I'm one hundred seventy percent sure that he died grabbing the ass of a hot blond secret agent. To Rick, who was definitely not a robot." He then raises his glass in tribute.

Rina raises her glass and says quietly, "Chertovski pravda."

Joshua says, "I could've killed him when he pulled out the Ouija board on the haunted ship. But even in tense situations, he never let anything get to him."

Christian swallows beer and then settles back down, "He had stage presence. A good actor never lets the audience know when they've flubbed a line." He sets his mug down on the table, then asks, "What do you four plan on doing now?"

"Other than getting drunk tonight?" Joshua takes a swig of his beer. "Rest for a while, I hope."

Rina says nothing but regards the liquor in her glass dubiously. It's colored, so it's not exactly vodka. //Figures.//

"Lay low," Nika responds immediately. Her demeanor since they landed has been quiet. Similar to their time on Miranda, she hasn't had a lot to say to anyone and has kept mostly to herself except to respond when spoken to. "Whatever passes for news is going to put us at the top of the gorram most wanted lists all over the Verse." Her tone is grim. "I wish we knew if the Wave even got picked up by enough people to make it worth Rick's life." She pauses. "And Zelle's." Though she didn't trust the woman, there's a respect there. The agent deserves that much.

"It was worth it." Joshua gives Nika a glance from across the table. "He thought it was. Don't lose faith, Nika."

"We'll see. I've got some feelers out." Christian slides a hand down the front of his green t-shirt, smoothing out a few positioning wrinkles. "Things like that have a habit of traveling, even when the cortex is more localized that it used to be. That might work to your favor. For now, resting here is a good idea. Lem could use some time with his mom and the rest of his family and I wouldn't mind some help around the office."

A glance gets slanted to Christian. "Oh goody," Nika replies, her tone dry as the dust of Angel itself. "Just what I wanted to do." As if the Reader and the Companion in the group -- hell, as if the whole group at the table! -- couldn't tell //that// was a Big Damn Lie.

"Where is Lem?" Rina looks up at the mention of her adopted son's name. "With the girls?"

Joshua pictured the empty lockers and cabinets of the Gift. "We're going to need a lot of time regardless just to figure out how to restock ourselves," he said quietly. "4 assault rifles and 3 cans of beans does not a stocked ship make."

"An assault rifle could take down an entire buffalo if this place had any. I'm game," replies Rina.

Joshua says, "But I'll gladly lend my services to you in the office, Christian. We can coordinate our financial books."

"Lem's with the girls, yes. They haven't had much of a honeymoon since their wedding." Christian answers Rina. "Another positive to your visit. They can go off for some time alone instead of helping me out or babysitting Lem while I work. Now..." He stands up, grabs Nika's collar, and begins walking to the door. "Excuse us. We have some stuff to discuss."

Joshua leans over the table to watch them leaving and shakes his head."Okay then. I guess that leaves us here to get drunk, Miss Rina." And as he finishes saying that, he finishes off his beer.

Nika blinks and gets hauled up by her collar, her expression disgruntled. "Caonima!! Christian, gorram it!" She hates it when the Companion pulls that crap. She ought to be happy he didn't simply grab her by the waist-length braid and yank. "Angel's turning you into a caveman!" she grouses... but she doesn't struggle with him, either. Her body language simply shuts further down.

Rina slumps in her seat as the Companion and the pilot leave, glaring morosely at the bottle on the table. //Nope. Not vodka.// She nurses her drink and sighs, tipping her chair back on its rear legs and closing her eyes.

"Maybe so, sir," Rina says. "But if I'm going to get drunk, I'd rather do it in private, behind closed doors, and with people I trust."

Christian calls out, just before he hits the door. "Rina, just ASK the man for vodka! I stocked it for you!" Once he's outside, he lets go of Nika and turns around, "You," he says, "are acting like a five year old. I get it. The Verse's broken, things aren't right with either of your lovers, the cause you believed in has been sullied, and a friend died on your watch. I understand. I do... but you need to get over yourself."

Joshua nods at her. "Fair enough. But we have no alcohol on the Gift. We can go back and find something else to do, or stay here and drink the bar's vodka." He pauses. "If we wait long enough, Christian might yell at us tonight too."

"Thanks, Mom!" Rina lets the chair fall to all fours with a thump and goes over to the bar to verify Christian's claim.

Narrowing her eyes at the Companion, Nika pulls upright when Christian releases her and says in a dangerously soft Border drawl, "You want to back off me just about now, Christian. I ain't in the mood to deal with Companions who think they know everything. Readin' about what happened to us in the missives that I send you ain't the same as livin' it and, all //due// respect, my friend..." That drawl's damn deep. "You're talkin' out your ass, cuz your mouth ain't got a gorram clue what it's talkin' about."

When Rina returns with a bottle of proper drink and two fresh glasses, she rolls her eyes and sits down. "True enough. I'm almost tempted to give him someething to yell about."

Joshua raises an eyebrow at her. "You know, I have no idea whether I should be for that or against that."

"Really..." Christian says. "Really. Because it looks like right now Rina and Joshua are about to join hands and leap off the ledge of the crater, they're so depressed, and you're practically pushing them. Joshua's going to have an aneurism acting stable because he thinks he has to while Rina's taking her "new me" act to a new, self-destructive level."

Joshua tapped one of the glasses. "Pour me some of that, will you, Rina?"

"Zdrovieh," she says as she pours them both a generous shot. She raises her glass, clinks it to his and knocks her drink back in one go.

"Well, darlin, you feel free to go talk to //her// about her self-destructive levels of gotta screw the next man because he's sweet and helpless and she can fix him the way you fixed her," Nika replies archly. "I haven't said word either in there or in private to either one of them to push them any direction at all. I've made a //point// of keepin' my gorram mouth shut because if I don't, Christian, I'm likely to say a whole lot of things that I'll regret as soon as they're outta my mouth. And my daddy always said not to cut off my nose to spite my face."

Joshua shakes his head and takes a swig from his glass, not coming anywhere close to draining it. "If I don't take it slow-ish, I'll be passed out here on the table," and he waves his hand broadly across the table, "and that wouldn't be very entertaining." And then, as if he hadn't heard a word he just said, took another drink.

Rina says, leaning in, "What do you think they're talking about, anyway?"

Then what Joshua says catches up with her and she says, "Don't worry, I can still haul you over my shoulder and carry you back home if I need to."

"Putting aside their relationship for a moment, as fascinatingly disfunctional as it is," Christian keeps his voice soft, gentle, "You're the core. You always have been. You set the pace for the rest of them. I realize it is a lot of responsibility but... Nika, you've swallowed so much from the "woe is me" bottle that your sister would be laughing at how grumpy you are." He pauses, then takes her hand and lifts it up, pointing to the sky. "Things haven't changed that much. Things seem bleak now but the 'Verse is still out there. The music's still playing between and betwixt those stars. You'll be back up there to hear it soon enough. You aren't dead and neither are they. You have love, you have family, and you have the soul of a daredevil poet."

"It isn't your fault, Nika." Christian gently takes the hand he's holding and places it against his own heart, "Rick doesn't forgive you because there's nothing to forgive. Now, you need to forgive yourself because.... well." He pauses, "... you know. You're not a robot."

Joshua leans in close so that his face is right up next to Rina's. "Honestly, I have no gorram idea. She's done a good job. She should have her grieving time."

"True," Rina says.

Joshua leans back and stares into the half full glass between his hands. "Whatever it is, it's probably exactly the right thing to say. I envy the man that talent." He really did. The benefits of Companion training? Or just something innate that the training enhanced? Whatever it was, Joshua would pay good money to be able to duplicate it.

Yanking her hand away from him after a brief moment of resting it on his chest, Nika rolls her eyes. "You're still the girliest man I ever met, Christian." The Border drawl has lessened but not vanished, though she smiles faintly. "There ain't no music -- right now, I need to be a robot. I can't deal with their baggage and mine," she admits. "He made the right call. They //both// made the right call," Nika says quietly to the Companion. "It doesn't mean I //like// it. And I'm beyond grumpy at this point. Shyla was //wrong//. I'm not cut out for this job; I can't //do// this. I sure as gorram hell can't //fake it// enough to keep them -- especially *him* -- from feeling it."

Rina pours herself another two fingers of vodka and knocks it back, then resolutely puts both glass and bottle aside. No point in both of them walking home soused. //Besides,// she thinks, //If I'm getting an ass-reaming from Christian once he's done talking to Nika, I want to be sober for it to enjoy every last goddamn syllable.//

Christian breaks out into a brilliant smile, "She forgot a lesson." He says, hooking his arm through Nika's. "Lesson number one? Captains don't do their job alone. Captains don't fly the ship and take care of the engine and cook the food and book the passengers and keep the books and treat the cuts and scrapes. They have crew to do it or help them do it. The same thing's true with their crew's heart and psyche. Think back. Was it Shyla who helped keep the social dynamic running? Not alone. Harry did her part. So did Brian. So did you, for that matter. You know what a captain's most important job is? Getting other people to do their job. And you've done that. You came here." He leads Nika inside. "Now..." He points to Joshua. "YOU!" he shouts, "Dance with this woman!" He shoves Nika forward. "She needs to boogey." As if on cue, the guy behind the bar presses a button on a box and something high energy begins playing.

//Dierma, here we go.// Rina thinks and eyes the bottle speculatively, gauging the pounds per inch pressure it would take to smash it and slash her wrists with it.

If there was one thing Joshua was good at, it was following orders. When Christian shouted at him from across the room, he stood up, walked over and grabbed Nika's hand and started leading her in a dance, something with complicated steps but that seemed to fit the energy of the music. "Hey, can I have this dance?"

//*Cao*nima//, Nika thinks to herself with a sigh. Gorram know-it-all Companions and their gorram know-it-all attitudes. Finding herself ordered about, Nika's feet reluctantly go the direction she's pushed and even as Joshua takes her hand she is following his lead. With a roll of her blue eyes and a shuttered kind of annoyance at Christian. She doesn't //want// to be cajoled out of her self-pity right now. She //deserves// a bit of a pity party! She //deserves// to get piss drunk and beat the snot out of someone. Or maybe fuck 'em blind, but //that// ain't happening anytime soon for sure.

"Sure," she replies in a resigned tone to Joshua. "Let's dance."

"Rina." Christian says, holding out his hand to his one-time lover, "Dance with me." He winks, "I missed my son's mother."

"Sweet talker." Rina rises and lets Christian take her out of the floor. "And I've missed my son's father."

"You know how to make a dance partner feel wanted." The tone of Joshua's voice is obviously playful. But as he is leading her in the dance, his voice grows a little more serious. "We don't have to dance if you don't want to. I told Rina you've done a good job. You deserve grieving time. Christian just needs privacy to yell at Rina. We don't have to dance to do that." He looked at her and smiles. "But I admit it's fun."

"I came home last week to find Lem had dismandled the fridge unit." Christian says as he leads Rina onto the dance floor, "He was trying to build a pet dog. I promised him we'd look into getting a real one once he was old enough to care for it." He kisses Rina's hand and then the dancing can begin. Of course, this isn't the right music for slow dancing, so Christian's lithe, Companion muscled body moves to a more kinetic beat.

Rina does what she can to keep up, but it looks more like he's dancing around her than with her. It's infectious, though, and after a few measures she manages to imitate the steps.

"I'm sorry," Nika says, her feet following the steps of the dance easily. She's been well schooled in a number of the social graces, if the lack of attention to her feet and her effortless follow of Joshua's lead is anything to go by. "It's not the dancing. It's the getting kicked in the butt by Christian. It always smarts a bit. Gorram man knows everything and he //handles// me. And I hate to be handled." She wrinkles her nose at Joshua with a faint smile. She seems... perhaps a little more at ease. It's not over, but she'll get through it.

"I'm not surprised. He's got an intuitive grasp of things mechanical." Rina crinkles a smile at Christian. "You might want to see about having him hang out with Muleskinner if you think he can grasp shop safety well enough."

"Takes after his mother." Christian laughs, "You need to spend time with him in the ship's engine room. He misses that most of all. He's spending a lot of time with Muleskinner already. Another few years, he'll be doing most of the work. He's noticing girls, too, a little. I had to deal with him tugging braids at school."

"If it makes you feel any better..." Joshua's maneuvering through the steps suggests some knowledge of formal dance as well. "This leaves me having to wait and anticipate getting kicked in the ass by Christian. At least you got it out of the way." He smiles to indicate he's not seriously worried.

Nika snickers with laughter, her face easing into easier lines finally. "Yeah, I suppose there's something to be appreciated there," she admits. "He reminds me every time he does it of Harry -- only she's more subtle. He's more like a sixteen-wheeled truck running over you when he's peeved. Or maybe it's just me that he handles that way, I don't know."

"Already?" Rina stops and stares a second, then recovers her step. "//Bozhe moi//. He's a *baby*, Christian. Girls should still be a pain in the ass, not an ass to grab." //God knows, my brothers barely tolerated me until I could fix their toys for them...//

Christian laughs with delight. "I know. I suppose he gets that from me? I don't know, honestly. He doesn't have the makings of a Companion or I'd be grooming him for it. I think part of it is he spends a lot of time with the girls and they still moon over each other." He glances over towards Nika and Joshua. "How do you want to introduce Joshua to him? Uncle? Mommy's boyfriend?"

Joshua somehow manages to shrug his shoulders while still moving in time with the music. "It's not like I don't deserve it." He grows quiet for a second and then says, "I wish I had gotten a chance to know Harry. I suspect I would've liked her. Heck, I *did* like her, and I only got a few minutes with her." Unfortunately, he thought, they had been forced to take a quick exit from the Decatur...and he hadn't been in the best of moods to start with.

//Damn you, Christian.// "I'll introduce him as 'Joshua', thanks. Any qualifier I think to put on it won't fool him for a minute," Rina says.

"You don't need to worry. It isn't like he expects a conventional family. We've already discussed sex and he knows what I do for a living," Christian says as he dances. Well, shouts just a little. Since the music's loud enough. "Besides," Rina says. "You forget. Lem was aboard when Joshua joined us. They've already met."

A flash of something -- so quick as to be not really there behind the shutters -- trails through Nika's blue eyes. "Perhaps someday," she tells Joshua softly. Not entirely sure she really believes it herself anymore. Much as Boros is no longer 'home', nor is 'home' on the Decatur. She couldn't survive being a tiny cog in the very large wheel that is the Longbow-class vessel.

"Something to look forward to." He smiles and it really is an infectious smile, hard to resist. And he chuckles as a thought about Rick crosses his mind. "Music and dancing seem the right way to celebrate the man," Joshua says, knowing Nika will know what he means. "You know, if he was here, he'd have found the only hot unattached woman on planet and would have her weak at the knees."

"Why stop at one?" Nika snorts with laughter as she follows him through the dance. She's starting to loosen up... sometimes dancing is even better than a good brawl. Certainily less painful, considering how many wounds she's still sporting. Though it's starting to make her ache. She'll go for a while longer, though.

"Truth to tell," Rina sighs. "It didn't much slow down after that. You left at just the right time, Christian. We've been stumbling from one disaster to another lately and it's getting so I don't trust the deck under my feet to stay still."

Rina spins to the music and faces Christian again. "And don't you start by saying 'Of course the deck isn't still. You're on a moving ship,'. I'm not in the mood for it."

Joshua laughs out loud. "I didn't think there would be more than one around, but hell, you're right. He'd manufacture a second one out of thin air." He looks over at Nika and softly smiles. "Thanks for dancing with me, Nika. It's nice. We haven't had much of a chance lately to be, well, you know, friends. I've missed that."

"There are days I wish I had gone with you." Christian admits, "I wish I could have helped you through it. It can be painful, hearing about the problems and knowing I'm not there." He watches Rina spin and claps, applauding. "But the decision was the right one. Lem's blossomed."

"Good. I knew he would." Rina's tone is incongruous with the music and the activity, even though she keeps up with both. "Seriously, a combat ship was no place for a little boy." She smiles at the Companion. "I swear, he must have grown six inches in the past six months."

She's spent any spare time they've had on the bridge teaching him instead of just being with him. Nika nods slightly, a pang of sadness stealing her breath. Every time she has to teach him, she flashes back to teaching Rick the same things and relives the fact that she'll never teach him another maneuver. Pulling her head back to the present once more, she smiles at Joshua. "I know. I'm sorry. I've... had a lot of things on my mind." As if that's not obvious. She pauses in the dancing, a bit short of breath and hurting for it now. "I need to stop," she murmurs. "I'm starting to hurt. Arden'll have a cow if I pull anything else." The ship's doctor was called away to handle a birthing, but at least he got to join the first part of the celebration of Rick's life.

"Time for food." Christian says, glancing at Nika and Joshua for a moment. He waves his hand at the guy behind the bar. The music is turned down. Moments later, food comes out. Steaks, mostly bleeding, salad, bread. All relatively fresh. "The girls insisted on cooking for you." He says as he escorts Rina back to the table, "He's grown two inches, by the way. Just two."

"Just two," Rina agrees. "But in all the right places."

As Joshua walks to the table with Nika, he softly says, "No saying sorry, Nika. No blame assigned."

Rina draws breath to say something else, but then catches sight of the meat and wastes no time sitting down in front of it.

"Joshua, I wrote you a recipe book." Christian says, "Hand written. All the crew's favorites. It should help a little." He settles down and begins munching on salad. "Tricks for making canned goods taste better. That sort of thing."

Rina's first bite of steak draws a reverent moan from her and her eyelids flutter as she sinks back in her chair. "Thank the girls for me," she says when she can speak again.

"Oh, sweet God of Faria's ancestors, that's steak," Joshua nearly shouts. He manages to get himself under control as he sits down and hears Christian talking to him, "Thanks, Christian, recipes are always welcome, especially from a talented cook like you."

So everyone keeps telling her. Which is sort of the problem. Everyone's so gorram busy assuring her that there's no blame, that it's not her fault, they're overlooking the obvious.... that he was //hers//. To look out for, to back up. To consent to his volunteering or to tell him that he was the only one to go. And she //abdicated// that responsibility. She failed in the first test of her mettle as the actual -- instead of simply the de facto -- captain of their vessel. But Nika bites that back, keeping her tongue firmly behind her teeth. And she smiles for Christian. "That was beyond nice of them. I can't wait to dig into that." Fresh food. Beef. Definitely a winner.

"I will." Christian says. He stays silent for a while, letting them eat. Watching the crew of the Summer's Gift. He doesn't touch the steak himself but contents himself with salad and baked potato and beer.

Joshua grew very quiet as he ate the meal. It felt like it had been forever since he had gotten to eat a real meal. It made him anxious to get back into the Gift's galley and *cook* something. If it had been forever since eating a real meal, it had been twice forever since he had cooked one.

"Is there a way we can get a side of this to go? Maybe stock our walk-in?" Rina asked Christian after a minute. She served up some salad to garnish her plate and got some of the bread to sop up the steak juice. "It's been ages since we'd eaten anything approaching real food."

Nika digs in with a more restrained gusto, grateful for the fresh food and ... for the fact that they had somewhere to go. They'd made it, barely, and now they had to put themselves back together. Nika's eyes skim across the people at the table, and when she meets Christian's gaze she hesitates. There's a faint nod, an acknowledgement perhaps that he's looking at her. Or perhaps a bit more. Then she drops her eyes to her plate and smiles a bit. "It's sort of like starting over again," she comments softly. And when she looks up, she tilts her head slightly. "How's the MeiMei doing anyway?"

"Probably not this." Christian admits, "But likely some mutton. Goat cheese. You guys have to be careful if you go beyond Lucifer's Landing. Angel has gotten... conservative. Sharia law rules. Lucifer's Landing has grown because of it. People escaping the restrictions or looking for a place where they can do business. I'm doing well, actually, because of it. Concubine training, though I always make sure that the girl is willing and not kidnapped or worse. Lot of secret homosexuality that needs venting. That sort of thing." He nods to Nika's question. "The MeiMei's trying to be a small gambling cruise. Doing okay so far, nothing spectacular but making enough to send a little home now and again. They run into their share of troubles."

As Nika mentioned the MeiMei, Joshua's thoughts moved to its captain, Marie, which then of course lead to thoughts of Rick. All roads lead to Rick tonight, he thought wryly. Only appropriate, perhaps."If they send some back now and again, they've been doing better than we've been. I shudder looking at our books. 'Course, benefit of starting over means I get to wipe the books clean, so to speak."

"Here's to second chances," Rina says, raising her empty glass and air-toasting with it.

"Hell yes," Joshua said in response, raising his empty glass as well. "To second chances." For the ship, for the crew, and for me, thought Joshua.

To Christian Rina murmurs, "Anything you can spare or we can trade for would be welcome. Goat cheese, goat, anything. Running on empty too long." She bits her lip and tucks into her food, thinking that this dinner was a good place to start gaining back the weight and tone she's lost. She just hopes Christian doesn't ask her about it. She hated being fussed over.

And third. And fourth. Nika looks between Joshua and Rina. She's been so carefully neutral with them lately -- with all of them -- that she's not sure how to step outside that mood anymore. She smiles faintly at both of them, the laughter from earlier still easing her body language. "To second chances," she says softly. //That//, Rick would have liked... he gave his life so the crew //had// another chance. Or maybe he just gave it to impress Zelle. She'll never be quite sure he hadn't viewed the whole thing as a lark to impress the girl. But even that thought has the ability to make her chuckle. She shakes her head slightly at the notion without sharing it for now.

Rina catches the chuckle and the headshake and squirrels it away for later. If later came. Some things are best observed but not delved into.

Or maybe, just maybe, he did it because he was Rick and sometimes, Rick just did stuff. Christian raises his cup and nods. "I'll make sure you're supplied before you take off. That shouldn't be a problem. As for the books... we can discuss business strategy another time. For now, this is vacation. And on vacation you have fun, do stupid things, and spend time with friends and family. Nika, there are a few horses in town. You should take Lem our riding."

"I'd //love// to," Nika admits with a smile. Some time on horseback would ease the need to fly. For a while. In the meantime she'll simply enjoy dinner and the company of frie... no. Family. Insofar as such a thing exists in her life, they have become one. "Save some steak for Arden or he'll have a complete conniption," she says with a smile.

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