Site 4: An Teng
In An Teng my allies rest. Though the town is occupied by the realm, this is a small thing compared to the dangers of a wild zone, a dragon’s nest, or a city of the dead. Hashimaru smooths the way, and Leaf’s research speeds my work tenfold. For them, these tasks as simple as respiring; their essence is more than adequate for the task. It is I that am lagging behind.
This was once a city of epic romances. I am reminded of this as I stalk through buried chapels, seeking the secrets of the makers. When I look above the altars I see decaying symbols of eternal love: the dove and the hart, the sun and the moon, the mountains and the sea. Purest white marble and burnished orichalc’ peer through the rust and dust of a hundred score years. I think of my own feeble passion, and it seems like an anthill before these monuments.
My essence is simply not strong enough. I tried once again to today to flood the channels, open the inner pathways and force the adamant countermagic to overwhelm the seal of a basalt sarcophagus. I was left panting, drained, and bleeding from my eyes. I am not yet pure enough, still too tied to mortality and the will of the flesh. And also...
And also, every time I open the third gate within, to summon the might of the sun and command creation by my divine right, I feel that I am opening myself to the awful gaze of things unspeakably ancient, to the attention of an evil that predates the stars and burns even in the void, the malice that can be killed but cannot die. It has followed me again.
How can I unlock the centuries-sealed portals when I know that doing so throws my mind open to they that eternally wait? I clench my pendant in my fist, let the cold burn my hand, and steel myself to try again. If she’ll defy a deathlord, then I’ll defy the yozis.
Trust[edit]
Rivers Between Us was hunched low over his notebook when Leaf Shakes the Wind entered noiselessly behind him, shutting the door gently with a raised palm. When he spoke, the young sorcerer did not flinch; he had become familiar with unexpected voices while traveling with the night caste.
“There are three more sites we can check tomorrow. Two graves in the hills outside of town, both lightly guarded, and a chapel in the city, which will take some work.”
Rivers nodded his head while continuing to transcribe his notes from memory.
Leaf perched on the edge of the bed and began mechanically checking over his disguise, looking carefully over the blue and gold jacket of office with a needle and thread clenched between his lips. “These bribes are costing us a fortune by the way, and it’s getting steeper. I think it’s started to get around that an aficionado of first age artifacts is in town, and it’s starting to affect the market.”
“I only need a couple more days of research here. The range of spells in this city is fairly narrow; I’m afraid that peaceful cities do not breed sorcerous innovation with a great deal of regularity.” He paused and rested his quill in the ink bottle long enough to cough violently into a stained towel, then continued.
The first rays of dawn were beginning to seep past the edges of the curtains. Leaf folded the uniform and stored it in the hidden third pocket of his saddle bags. “If we leave in an hour then we can hit the changing of the guard at the first site. Unless you need to rest, of course.”
“I’m fine. I think I caught an hour while you were out.”
Leaf looked at him with his piercing eyes, his face emotionless. “You’re pale as a ghost, your hands are shaking, and I doubt you can afford to cough up that much blood without consequences. You’ve got a cold sweat and that meal at your elbow was put there twelve hours ago.”
“All right, after these three I’ll get some rest tonight.” He put away the quill and scattered fine sand over the pages of the notebook, then blew them gently away. “You know we don’t have a lot of time. As long as I can keep moving, I have no right to slow down. You know why.”
“I don’t think I do.” He pulled an apple from his pack and began segmenting it with flashing strokes of a small knife. “We can’t possibly have an army trained and ready in the next six months. While the ultimate circle may be useful, it would hardly allow us to attack or defend against any of our neighbors without a united Murakan to back it up. No, I don’t see why you need to complete your studies within the week. Why is it?”
“But I am so close now.” He stood, heavily leaning on his chair, and walked slowly the window, pulling aside the curtain a hand’s breadth. Outside the coming of the sun was presaged by delicate pink and tangerine traces of feathered clouds on an aquamarine background of clean sky over the deeper blue of the sea. “I’ve almost reached the last stage. I can see now how everything I’ve learned so far is just a pale reflection of the adamant circle. The only thing that remains is for me to push through the mirror into the clean, open air of the real world, where the link between essence and action is as natural and direct as that between my swords and my enemies.”
Leaf tossed him a piece of apple. “That doesn’t really answer my question. Caution should be your guide as you near the end.”
“How can I wait now? What if there was a way that it could break her...”
“Her?”
Rivers let the window curtains fall closed and leaned against the wall, chewing slowly on the fruit. He swallowed, almost painfully, and cleared his throat. He opened his mouth to speak, then shook his head. He tried again. “Leaf, I know that you... well... that all of you, the whole circle, don’t really trust me.”
Leaf Shakes the Wind sighed softly, scratching his temple with the handle of the knife. “That’s not true. Trust isn’t the issue, Rivers. Not really.”
“Maybe not to you...” He wandered back to the full bowl of stew and dumped it into the chamber pot. “I have a favor to ask of you, Leaf.”
“Hm. Any favor that opens like that is guaranteed to be unpleasant. But... I guess I am here to help. What is it?”
“Don’t... just don’t kill her. Kena. Not Kena. Whoever she is. Or he. Or poison, or maim or... I don’t know, torture her with mind powers...”
“Wait, wait. Mind powers? What mind powers?”
“You know what I mean. Just don’t.” He pushed the chamber pot out the door with his foot. “I need your help for something, but until you agree to that, I can’t tell you. I mean, I know it’s going to come out one of these nights, but I warn you that if I see it coming I’ll snap this spell over my knee like a twig. So will you promise me?”
“Look...” The Night Caste rubbed the bridge of his nose with his fingers. “I think you were right before. Maybe trust is the issue.” Leaf lowered his hands to his lap. “Rivers, do you trust me?”
“Yes...” he looked out the door and coughed. “Completely. Totally.” He closed the door and puffed out his cheeks, then coughed into his fist. “Well, except, I think you’d probably kill Kena if you ever saw her again, and I don’t want that. I, uh, trust you’d do that. And that would be a mistake. And I’m not saying that just because she kissed me and it was awesome. I only met her five times you know. Until she tried to kill me once... or twice. But you still haven’t answered me.”
Getting to his feet, Leaf paced up the side of the room, to stand near the fire. “I know how you feel about her, even after what she did.” He looked into the flames for a few moments. “I’m not a monster.”
“Wait, who are we talking about?”
“I saw her. When we were leaving Nexus. I think it was her. She looked different, but still... I could just tell. She was watching us, watching you, I guess, from one of the battlements. She was still in range,” Leaf shook his head. “But I let it go. She wasn’t coming after us, so I let it go.”
“You did?” He looked at him with confusion. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“What good would it have done? You would have wanted to chase after her or something, and, trust me, if she didn’t want us to find her, we wouldn’t have. And if she did want us to find her, she’d just show up, wouldn’t she? That’s how it’s always been before.” Leaf stirred the embers with an iron rod. “I just decided to wait until you couldn’t go all nuts about it.”
“Well now I am nuts, thanks. And I was already so sane in Nexus, anyway. You see, this is why I... I mean, why people don’t... people in general don’t trust people... who sneak...” He fumbled in his pack for a skin of wine and poured it in his mouth. “I can’t keep my head straight. All right, I’ll take that as a yes, you won’t kill her. If anyone gets to kill her, it’s me. But I’m not going to. I have plan.”
“Of course. She tries to kill you, and all your energy goes into figuring out some way that you can save her, since she’s obviously just a pure soul under the sway of forces beyond her control. But I try to help you, and I can’t be trusted because ‘I sneak.’ Ugh.” Leaf stabbed another log with the poker. “What’s your stupid plan?”
“It’s easy. We sneak under the deathlord’s fortress state of Thorns into some kind of underworld labyrinth, find some kind of horrible mind-controlling artifact, then sneak out with it.” He gave a weak smile.
“You’re serious?” Leaf blinked. “You’re serious.”
“Yes.” He sat heavily on the bed and yawned. “That’s why I need to learn adamant circle sorcery in a week. And that’s why I need your help.”
“I don’t know. I wouldn’t want to corrupt you with all that sneaking.”
“I am impervious to corruption. And essence cannons. And poison.” He yawned again. His lids drooping. “Gods, why am I so sleepy...”
“Oh, the catstongue powder will do that. In fact, that’s pretty much all it does.”
“Damn.” Rivers fumbled awkwardly for his hook swords. “Did I leave a hearthstone in the warbird again...”
“I’m afraid so.” Leaf watched as Rivers’ swords clattered to the ground. “I’ll promise you two things, Rivers.” He grabbed the Twilight’s legs and lifted them up to the bed. “Number one is this: I will do everything I can to help save your girlfriend. However,” he pulled a blanket up around his friend’s shoulders, watching as Rivers tried desperately to keep his eyes open, “Number two is this: I will not let your lack of judgement get you killed, regardless of the circumstances. Now sleep tight.”
I was here. We were here.
Rivers has undertaken this journey in order to force open doors, to pull hidden things into the light. And every stop that I make with him, I seem to fall through a door of my own without even trying. I think it has something to do with the Unity of Dreams. My memories of the past were sparse at best before; I’d learned more from a single old letter or book than I could recall in my head. Now, though, each step we take sends waves that wash into the past and bring back flotsam of a live once lived.
Allat… Sun-Blackened Pinions… whoever she/he is… As I walk the halls of the now-buried An Teng, as I explore these ruins of a city built to house the love of the most powerful beings in Creation, I see her face, then his, then both, interchangeably. I feel her/his fingers trace along the back of my neck. I step into a room that has not been disturbed in a thousand years, and I recall what it looked like when the Sun beamed through its windows and the two of us embraced in its warmth.
He said to prove myself. But how can I? How can anyone prove, not that they’re not evil now, but that they’ll never be evil at all? Or was that simply his way of saying that he’ll never trust me, no matter what I do?
-- From the journal of Leaf Shakes the Wind, Night Caste spymaster
